Well, this is not really a coming out story, because I haven't come out to anybody, maybe just to myself a little bit. It's not that I've been saying that I'm not a lesbian, I know that somewhere deep, but still...anyway, to the point.. I'm sorry to bother you with this, but I just need to let it out. So...I'm in a difficult situation right now, to make long story short - I fell in love with a woman I have no possible chance with, and that's not only because she's straight..I fell in love with her, and after less than a year I found out that she's gonna leave and I probably won't see her again. She left 3 months ago and I was really desperate, I've lost all my motivation...but when it started to get just a tiny little piece better, she announced on her facebook that she's going for a visit for five days, she's gonna be here till this friday. I didn't know what to do, whether I should cry or be happy that she's here again..I met her today, and all that feelings that I had for her are back and it's going to be the same as it was in the beginning all over again.. So what I'm trying to tell with this is that I realized, that if I'll ever go crazy like this for someone, if I'll ever cry for someone like I cry for her..it's always going to be a woman. That's probably all I wanted to say, thank you all, if you take time to read this
Hi there! Never worry about needing to post something or needing to let something out. This is what EC is here for. Hope it helped you a bit. Even though the chance of something working out between you and the woman for whom you have strong feelings isn't there, the feelings you have developed for her, are an important clue for you. It could help you in finding that motivation to come out and 'fully' accept yourself. Every step that you take (and as small as it might seem) is an important one.
Acceptance of yourself as lesbian, is a HUGE step. I should know I spent the last 30 yrs denying that I'm gay. Once you do though, you will feel SOOO much better, at least at first I think. *actually I know*
