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If you've ever had to come out as gay to a straight partner, I want to hear about it!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by anonymousjane, Oct 1, 2012.

  1. anonymousjane

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    Hi guys,

    I'm a lesbian in a two-year relationship with a man. And I'm thinking of telling him I'm gay soon. Like, really really soon. And I'm nervous about it. Really really nervous.

    If anyone's ever had to do something like this before, I'd really appreciate it if you could share your story. When did you realize the relationship wasn't working? How long did you wait to tell your partner? What did you say to them, and how did they take it? How did you feel afterwards?

    I'm just feeling sort of isolated and really want to hear from people who have dealt with a similar thing. So, go ahead and share, please!

    Thanks,
    Jane
     
  2. BBird75

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    Re: If you've ever had to come out as gay to a straight partner, I want to hear about

    Hi Jane,
    I have!! I came out to my husband of 14 years about 5 weeks ago. I haven't got time to write much just now, but if you have a look for my other threads and posts you'll find some answers to your questions above. Write on my wall if you want!
    The best advice I can give is... come out! You've been with him for 2 years, and it'll be har for him to understand and take, but after a 15 year relationship, keeping things hidden, and a kid or two to worry about, you don't want to be doing it then! Trust me!!
    Bluebird x
     
  3. pandas

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    Re: If you've ever had to come out as gay to a straight partner, I want to hear about

    Have you told anyone else you are gay yet? Perhaps tell your best friend? This might take some weight off of things and at least give you a support system.

    It will be hard, but if you can talk to at least one person, or maybe a few close friends who know the both of you, they will be able to give you some strong moral support.

    Personally, I am bisexual currently in a hetero relationship and my situation is not the same, but I wish you lots of strength and luck!
     
  4. anonymousjane

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    Re: If you've ever had to come out as gay to a straight partner, I want to hear about

    Thanks, Bluebird, I just went back and read some of your posts about your coming out to your husband. It's really nice to hear from somebody who's been through that kind of difficulty. And it's extra nice that you seem to be doing quite well :slight_smile: Thank you so much for sharing!

    ---------- Post added 1st Oct 2012 at 06:32 PM ----------

    Thanks for the well-wishes, pandas! I have thought about telling other friends first, but it just doesn't feel right to me. I feel like he deserves to be the first to know. Still, thank you so much for the support :slight_smile: It's always nice to hear from others.