Well last night my parents really were getting on my case because they saw I was texting a guy frequently. I was in the basement and my dad came down and talked to me about it. He ended up crying and saying God hated him because he had 3 failures as children... 1. An Atheist who dropped out of college 2. A smoker 3. A gay son So I was kind of getting mixed signals from him because he says he loves me...but calls me a failure? Yeah...he obviously doesn't like the idea of me having a boyfriend, but my mom is whole different story. She was happy that I found someone I can relate to and be happy with....but she said he can't come in the house ever. So I started crying and she said sorry. I was thinking: If you were sorry you would let him come over. So now whenever I text: You texting your boyfriend? I just want them off my back. But my mom is better with my boyfriend than my dad Soooo yup.
Good job man, always tough comin out cuz you never know what the responses will be. Sorry about your dads reaction, but at the very least, at least he still loves you eh.
It sounds like your father just needs time. Maybe he has a lot of stress, maybe he's just confused, I don't know. If he said that he loves you (and you know it as well) then in the end things will turn out for the better between you two. Happy to hear about your mom being so open to it!
As far as the whole thing with your dad goes you'll have to see how that all plays out. I'll say this though him calling you a failure.... I don't think he necessarily means it as much as he just feels like he himself failed as a parent which he didn't because you made the choice NOT saying that you yourself are a failure but that that's a choice you made. You NOR him have NOTHING to feel guilty about. I'd love to know how things are progressing, so keep me posted.:icon_bigg
Wow, he certainly won't win any awards for "Father of the year" if he views all his children as failures. It sounds more like he's got insecurities himself and is holding everyone to an unreachable standard. I think if you give him a bit, he'll come around... but he's clearly got some of his own issues, which have nothing to do with you, to work on.
And some people wonder why I stopped going to church when I got a drivers license and could go somewhere else on Sunday mornings...
Ugh, that's a terrible thing for him to say. I hope you don't believe that you're a failure. It's sad that your boyfriend can't come to your house, but it's not really that big of a deal I don't think because your parents probably wouldn't give you much privacy anyways if he could. You can always see him at his house or another place.
*hugs* aww. (*hug*) i'm sorry about your dad's dumb remarks, but it sounds like you've got the psych edge over him (which gives you a unique advantage). I'm very glad you have a boyfriend btw.
Smoking makes someone a failure? Wow, I'm screwed. I'm all 3 of those things! On a serious note, congratulations for finding someone
This is what I thought too...Your dad has problems, none of which have anything to do with you or your sexuality. I know it still sucks, but keep that in mind.
Pretty much that! It is a shame that your dad essentially says that all of his three sons are failures. Hopefully he'll change his views and attitude. Glad to read though that your mom seems to be a bit more understanding.
Well, what matters most is that you aren't a failure. It just sounds like your dad just needs some time. As for getting them off your back, just remember that parents do that sometimes, it has nothing to do with your sexuality. Just ask them firmly, but tactfully, to stop asking every time.
