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Came out to best friend.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Conky3000, Nov 27, 2012.

  1. Conky3000

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    This might be long but bear with me. Ever since I was 11 years old I have been dealing with anxiety and panic attacks, which only became more and more frequent since around the age of 16 when I realized I was gay. Around June they started to become unbearable so I went back on medication. 2 weeks ago I had massive panic attacks which lead me to finally make an appointment with a professional who deals with this stuff. My best friend has seen me go through some of these attacks and told me not to cancel the appointment, like i have done with many others in the past. So now my story begins. I picked him up to go get some food and then head back to his house for a night of video games. On the drive back we started to talk about my apprehensions to open up about my anxiety problems to a Therepist. He told me just to open up and finally deal with this because he has seen how much I struggle with anxiety. I told him that's what I intend to do but hate when they ask personal questions. He started talking about how I could just say I don't want to talk about that with them, and that's when I just said it "I Like Dudes". Without any hesitation he said " that's it, that's why you don't want to go get help with your anxiety?" I said "yes, thats why. we're cool? you're not going to tell me to go home?" He said "of course not". We then ate our food and played video games just like we always have. I still can't believe I came out and that it went so well, considering i was going to bracade myself in the closet for my whole life.
     
  2. Skyline

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    And coming out with more people eventually can make things even better. This really isn't as scary as it first seems, most people understand. I wish you luck!
     
  3. TheFirstStep

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    I had the same feelings when I contemplated coming out to my best friend. And the feeling that I got after saying it was horrible, I saw his face, and there was no expression.

    I looked down, then he told me that this could never affect our relationship as friends, and that it diddnt bother him in the least bit. Acceptance... I felt so liberated, and thankfull that my best friend had no problem with me the way that I am. And now I am happy to say, his reaction, being so positive, gives me strength to come out to others.

    Including my parents. Ill be talking with them sometime this week.

    But I am so happy that all went well with you and your friend! I wish you the best of luck coming out to others and getting started on your journey to finding yourself.
     
  4. Mirko

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    Welcome to EC! It's wonderful that your coming out to your best friend went so well. Hopefully the coming out will help with reducing some of the anxiety attacks. :slight_smile:
     
  5. SparkDT

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    I found it really hard to make the first step and come out to my best friend as well, but the feeling after you do is unbelievable. Congrats :slight_smile:
     
  6. WilliamM

    WilliamM Guest

    Coming out to my best friend was hard but he had the same reaction yours did :icon_bigg
    It also gave me the courage to tell my dad and step-mom just yesterday and just a few minutes ago i told my brother they all took it well
    Im sure your friends reaction will give you courage like mine did:icon_bigg
     
  7. MixedNutz

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    Congrats. The first person is always hardest.
     
  8. Conky3000

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    thanks. but i think i might have made a mistake. i felt great the days following the coming out but i started to feel horrible soon after that. i started feeling a great deal of remorse. my friend has been nothing but supportive and i appreciate it but i know things will never me same between us. I'm afraid that i make him uncomfortable but he's too much of a good guy to tell me. i just feel more lost than before. anyone else felt like this after coming out?
     
  9. rday13

    rday13 Guest

    He sounds like a great friend. Congrats on your first coming out!
    Coming out often lifts a great weight off people's shoulders and they become more secure in themselves. But it's not a smooth and simple process to confidence. For now, don't worry about making him uncomfortable - you're still the same guy that you were, and the same guy he's been best friends with. The only difference is that he now knows that you like dudes. Observe his behavior - from the sounds of it, he's supportive and ok with your coming out. Use the support to reassure yourself that he won't just disappear. While things won't be 100% the same (I mean, you'll discuss hot chicks but he'll know you're not interested, for instance), coming out to him doesn't mean you did a total 180 overnight. You're still you :slight_smile:
     
  10. JoshXD

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    I used to have really bad anxiety attacks, and I couldn't even exit the house. I know how horrible it is.

    I'm really happy you have a supportive friend! Good luck with everything :slight_smile: