Why do we have to come out?

They come out to relieve the negative emotions from society's negative ideology on homosexuality, however it is gradually reducing over time. Seeing as gay people take up like 10% (I think it was?) of the population, being gay certainly isn't the norm, so it isn't seen as normal.

Personally, I'm glad people come out. It makes me aware that there are actually other gay guys around that I can get to know.

All the best.

 

To be very honest, I agree with you. There shouldn't have to be a "coming out" But it seems that as society starts to become more accepting, sooner or later in the future, people won't have to worry; they'll just say "I'm gay" or "I'm straight" And so on. That's how I see it...

 

I agree, we shouldn't have to come out. It should be a simple, "I'm gay" or "I'm straight" or "I'm bi" or whatever. I believe it's just because we're different, and society can take a while to get used to different.

 

Coming out is fun and liberating and downright exhilarating. Share with the world who and what you are and show your proud exuberance for life and love.

 

I know what you mean, I think it's bullshit. Once you escape one label you're then immediately placed under another only to be expected to live up to that stereotype. Like most people I know think that all lesbians are butch rugby playing women and all men are like Gok Wan, and if you're not exactly like them then 'you're going through a phase.' Grr. Really grinds my corn.

 

True but what non of us realy whant is for ppl at all no one whants tgis i dont think but if that happines thare will bea school for gay ppl and one fir straight ppl and thats homophobic just saying but i 100% see whare ur coning from

 

I think we only have to because its been apart of society from start that to find love if you are apart of the LGBT community you need to announce it so others don't figure you as heterosexual. Otherwise I agree with you.

 

Well, coming out implies having been in before, hiding, maybe pretenting, etc... One day hopefully the question will simply be part of the typical social conversations such as "so, are you married, single? cool, oh you're gay? still cool - have you met my friend Bob?".

And when you think of it, it's not like everyone needs to know without actively hiding it either (do you know if the receptionist at your dentist's office is single, married, lesbian, and does it matter at all) ?

 

We shouldn't have to. But at this point in time, it seems that we have greater access to things that can give our life genuine happiness if we do.

 

I agree, we shouldn't have to "come out". But the world is not there yet, often we have one of two choices.

1. Hide who we really are, who we are attracted to or who we are dating
2. "Come out"

Being gay is still not viewed as the Norm, esp if our family or friends are not accepting of it.
My friend yesterday was telling me he has this big speech prepared to come out to his friend. I say only use it if need be. What I find, is if we act nonchalantly about it, we will lessen the stigma of it not being normal and in turn chip away at the need for the coming out process.

 

My guess is in the near future, the concept of coming out would slowly fade out and many people don't see each other's as merely labels. But then again, the near future refering to perhaps half a century away

 

we do, and will probs have to for a while, b/c of society's hetero-normative view of ppl, as being straight is assumed to be the norm & therefore we have to tell ppl that we're actually homo/bi/whatever.

 

I like this. Yes, we shouldn't have to. It's just the way it is.

 

It's not assumed to be the norm though, it is the norm.

I'm not trying to be offensive, obviously not since I identify as predominantly gay, but there is a reason for coming out.

We're statistically a minority, and we're a minority of something that cannot be viewed physically. We have to make our presence known to be acknowledged, and truthfully I don't see this ever changing.

Sure, I agree that in the future, saying you're gay or bi will be less of a big deal. But you're still gunna have to say it, and thus 'come out'.

 

i often wondered this.
i dont have an answer though.... never could come up with one :dry:

 

I don't know either, and I wish we didn't have to come out. Straight people don't need to come out, why are we put through this torture? I don't want to be known as a lesbian or gay, I want to just be me, you know?

 

I had to "come out" as an athiest too =P

 

you're right, i should probably have said normal instead of the norm

but i still think my point - that in the future ppl won't just assume that ppl are straight -still stands

 

I agree with most of the posts here in that coming out really shouldn't be mandatory for us in a progressive, wholly-accepting society, except such a society does not exist. There's too much stigma about homosexuals, whether it's because of religion, homophobia, or just plain ignorance.

But honestly, I think coming out has some benefits to it. First of all, it's one of those experiences that all gays have in common that unifies the community. People can connect with others based on interests, culture, and even ethnicity; I've seen it happen. But what stronger bond is there than one of shared adversity? Whenever I meet someone who's gay, I think it's wonderful, albeit unfortunate, that both of us has felt the insecurity, pain, loneliness, and rejection of coming out, and it's as if we already share a fundamental experience.

Another positive aspect of the coming out process is that it's a way of showing the people you care about most how you feel about them. When I made my decision to come out, I chose the people I cared about the most; not only did I think they would be supportive, I also believed it was a way to show respect for them, wanting them to know who I truly was.

Similarly, Charles Beyes writes in his memoirs, "My Husband and My Wives":
"Once in the more enlightened 1970s I had a young boyfriend who, shortly after we began our relationship, announced that he intended to tell his parents that he was gay. The old fogy in me counseled caution and silence, whereupon he said, and I shall never forget: 'I don't want either of them to die without knowing me as I truly am.'"

After all this, I reiterate that coming out shouldn't be so necessary, but it is, and it will probably be that way for generations to come. It's debilitating painful, and intimidating, but it's also a profound, empowering experience that (and not to sound overbearing here) most straight, "normal" people will never know of.