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My sister ignores my sexuality

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by dudedette, Dec 5, 2012.

  1. dudedette

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    The only person I ever came out to was my sister. Trust me, it was hard. Especially because we both are in the same room face-to-face, and my family is a bunch of homophobes:icon_sad:. So I told her because she is also, besides my sister, my best friend.
    She asked me akward questions such as "do you like men who are hot and stuff?" :icon_sad:and so I said no. She dismissed me and said "then your asexual."
    To this day she believes I'm not gay nor am I straight, so I just left it at that. When other people ask her, she says "He's not gay, he's just girly." LOL:icon_bigg

    Yep, so technically I'm still in the closet. Back to square one.:bang:
     
  2. myheartincheck

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    It always sucks when someone dismisses what you're telling them in confidence. I'm sorry bro. =/
     
  3. dudedette

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    Yea, but now it makes it harder to approach her a second time to clarify myself.
    She will probably ask me "did you kiss a boy yet?" and if i say "No" she will just say "you don't know if your gay until you've dated both a girl and a boy"

    Seriously, I think denial is exactly how my parents would take it.
    Their last resort would be an arranged marriage with some chick I hardly know.
     
  4. myheartincheck

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    Sometimes my dad will tell me "How do you even know if you like women? You have no experience with them" and I say "How did you know you were straight? You just KNOW." Some people define orientation on what you act on, but I define it as who you're attracted to.

    Also... would your parents really do that...? O_e
     
  5. dudedette

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    Also... would your parents really do that...? O_e[/QUOTE]

    Yes, yes they would.

    You have a good point. I wish I would've thought about that reply at that moment. I'm not really clever.:eusa_doh:
    I mean there's nothing in particular about who you like, it just is the way it is.
    I mean I didn't want to end up in this situation, its just the way it is.

    If there was a straight pill, trust me, I'ld take it.
     
  6. myheartincheck

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    I'm sure you're very clever. I'm very sorry that your parents are so homophobic. I thought mine would be but they've been surprisingly supportive, even if my dad doesn't necessarily understand. God bless him for trying though!

    And if there were a straight pill I wouldn't take it because anything that messes that much with your brain chemistry has got to have some awful side effects! :confused:
     
  7. FemCasanova

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    Sorry to hear that!

    I think you might want to try to just forgive her. If she`s not capable yet of accepting the truth about who you are, then it`s on her head. There`s very little you can do about it, but let time be your helper. I don`t think you are back to square one. I think you are being unfair to yourself to think so. You did actually tell her, you did your part. The rest is up to her. All you can do is be honest about it. You are open then, to her, and have taken an important step. The next step is all hers! And unfortunately, people deal with stuff in their own way, and pace. She might just not be able to admit it to herself, that you are actually telling her the truth. It doesn`t make her a bad person, just someone who either needs some more time, or is a bit closed off. It`s what you feel that matters in this situation. I think you should give credit where it is due, and you deserve to feel proud that you did tell her! However she responded has nothing to do with you. It`s her reaction and her emotions. Just keep at it. Try to be a little patient, and if you feel she is crossing a line, let her know in a respectful way. Then you don`t lower yourself, but you still stand up for yourself like you deserve. We can only control our own reactions and behavior :slight_smile: But try to be happy that you did the brave thing and told her, without letting her reaction take anything from that!
     
  8. dudedette

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    LOL, My career field I'm going into is Chemistry. Maybe I'll try to create a pill like that......or maybe I'll create a LGBT pill and distribute it so everyone can finally understand. Muhahaha.

    Just joshin, I would never.
    Thank you for the encouragement, I really do hope I can be more clever and have an answer for difficult questions. Then maybe I can finally come out in a
    non-stereotypical way.
     
  9. myheartincheck

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    AN LGBT PILL! DOOOOO IIIITTTT! :lol:
     
  10. dudedette

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    Thank you.
    Me and my sister is actually still really close, despite her dissmissal of my sexuality.
    I think she personally don't care what I am. I think she ignores it because she is trying to protect me from the cruelty society puts against LGBT. And so she keeps me locked up to protect me.
    I know this because I can honestly say, she is the only one who ever really cared for me:icon_bigg
     
  11. FemCasanova

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    I am glad to hear that :grin:

    So, then she technically has good intentions. And for the record, I am firmly against anti-LGBT pills. Society needs to change, not us!

    Well, that`s just my opinion :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: And if you enforce an LGBT pill on the people, there might be some negative reactions to it, and a lot of divorces, lol!
     
  12. dudedette

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    Awww Shiz, that would be soo fun.

    LGBT Pills for everyone!!!
    This isn't a revolution bitshes! Its aFawken Apocolypse!! LOL
    Damn.:eusa_clap It would be a horrible thing. But it would also be a fun thing to see.
     
  13. FemCasanova

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    Not to mention how depressed my mother would be, she loves men and their "equipment". She`s always said how grateful she is that I got the lesbian gene, not her. Oh, well, I guess she`d just have to adapt and accept herself, lol!
     
  14. dudedette

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    LOL, You have an awsome MOM. ^_^
     
  15. FemCasanova

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    Haha, thanks! She`s got a few good sides :grin:
     
  16. sguyc

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    I would think you are asexual also if you claim that you don't find guys hot.
     
  17. The Escapist

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    Hmm.. Your orientation says Bromantic, so biromantic? Did you explain to her that you have romantic feelings towards men? I wouldn't say you're in the closet because you did tell her, their reaction doesn't count. It's what you do that counts. And you did it.
    Congrats!
     
  18. dudedette

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    Thanks I feel a little bit relieved. I finally did something brave ^_^.
    I guess I gained a little bit more confidence from the experience right.

    I'm on my way to accepting myself!