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Came out to best friend!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Akatosh, Dec 24, 2012.

  1. Akatosh

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    I tried coming out in person many times to him, and I always failed at starting the conversation. Today, I wasn't even planning on telling him, but I got atext from him about him being tired of spending time with his homophobic, racist relatives. Out of no where, I texted a lengthy text describing my confusing sexuality, and he immediately returned "xoxoxoxo", followed by a supportive message. He said he still loves me and wants me to be myself. I explained how hard it was to bring up in person, and he didn't care. He wants to talk in person when we see each other next about it. He was already closer than any of my brothers, and now we seem to be even stronger. I'm so glad I got that out of my system. I almost used the momentum from this to come out to my dad, but I couldn't get the words out and fumbled with the dialogue so much that I ended up talking about my brothers dating life. :-/

    I think I might each of my parents a letter ( a single letter doesn't seem tailored enough) to open the conversation. I'm so afraid they will be upset, or disappointed. I'm so tired of being isolated and cut off from people emotionally, it almost doesn't seem to matter. What are y'all's thoughts on writing letters?

    ---------- Post added 25th Dec 2012 at 01:52 AM ----------

    I should edit this, but will just explain that it's my phone and my rulings fault. And I can't sleep. And there are deer on my rooftop.
     
  2. CinePhys

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Cornwall
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I think writing letters/texts are good, I've done one to my mum, but she's the kind of person that didn't think it was important and I had to remind her when talking about prospective girlfriends and what not, which I suppose is a good thing. I'm at a stage with 1 of my 2 best friends where I can just chat about it to him and it's like it's 2 straight people talking about girls, even though he's straight. You could say we have a nongay-gay relationship where he puckers his lips and teases me (in a nice way) as well as kisses in texts etc. I think having a relationship with a close friend like that where you can have a relaxed chat about things you would otherwise feel uncomfortable about is important in building confidence to come out to more 'important' people in your life should you feel like you want to, although I was already out by the time I could speak to him like this, I would imagine it does help.

    Hope this helps, but I'm by no means an expert!

    Have a merry Christmas!:smilewave
     
  3. Argentwing

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    Location:
    New England
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Heh, the way your friend put "xoxoxo" and how he loved you, it makes me wonder about him too. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    Congrats, though. I never get tired of hearing success stories that lead to stronger friendships.
     
  4. Akatosh

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    He's also my roommate, I've known him for 9 years, and I've heard way too much of him and his gf consumating across the wall. He might be a 1 on the Kinsey scale, but we view each other as family. He was there for me when I was struggling, and I was there when he was struggling. Now, time to plan my outing with the family!