I Came Out to My Mother... A Month Ago

I don't know why I didn't post this then, but I really think it was only because I was in some sort of shock for the few days afterwards. Telling her just felt right at the moment that I did; we were both in good moods (which was something I had been waiting for), I was hyped up on pop (I've had three cans that day when I don't normally drink that much at all), and I felt like I was about to burst sooner or later, so I wanted to tell her before that happened and I did it at a bad moment. So, I just randomly decided to tell her while she was making chicken alfrado for supper.

I told her something had been bothering me for a while to which she responded "I know". And then I asked her to guess what had been bothering me, but she said that she really wanted me to tell her myself and that she didn't just want to guess and for me to tell her if she was right or wrong. In the end I didn't come out and say that I was a lesbian, but just told her that I had a crush (which had been going on for about a year and a quarter now), and I finally told her that it was on a girl. Immediately she asked if it was on ___ (the girl at my school that I talked about a lot) and the smile that appeared on my face at the mention of her name was enough for her to know and then for some reason at that moment I started crying. It felt like instinct or something considering the same thing had happened when I came out to my school counselor. She hugged me and let me cry for a while (in which the water on the stove almost boiled over during the time) until I finally calmed down. Even though I hate crying it still felt all right, even though I made my mother cry too because she hates seeing me cry. It was just a really strong and emotional moment between me and my mother.

After we had both stopped crying she just started asked me some other questions about my sexuality (How long have you known? Are you still open minded enough that if a man walks into your life that you love you would still accept it? Does your sexuality have anything to do with you being an atheist? etc.) until finally my father came home and we were forced to quiet down again, in which she also told me not to tell my father (in which I responded that I didn't plan to for a very long time). When my father walked into the house our eyes were still sort of red, but after that we started acting like normal again.

Me and my mother don't really talk about my sexuality, but I think that's only because we don't want my father to hear and that it's just not the most important thing going on in my life right now. I'm content with how things are going for now- because I really don't have a reason to have a girlfriend right now and the girl that I do like I now think somewhat hates me- but overall I think that my mother has accepted me for the most part and I am happy that I came out to her.