I wish I'd never told my family, friend, and therapist. I'm so grossed out by me. I can never go back and undo it. I feel like they are gonna judge me. It's scary to think that people know what makes me wanna orgasm.
Don't be grossed out by yourself! Nobody will judge you. After all, your family will always care about you no matter what, and if your friend doesn't accept you, he or she isn't a true friend. And everyone knows what makes straight people want to orgasm. Simple as that. Being gay is not normal. It's better than normal.
This is my exact problem. I even regret telling my parents from time to time. You just gotta think about it like this. How often do you visualize your friends of family bumping uglies. I hope it is not often, and the same goes for you with your friends and family, they aren't going to imagine with scissoring another chick just like you're not going to imagine your dad giving it your mom reverse cowgirl. Just think about how ridiculous and wrong it is to do this. So your worries are more your insecurities. I have the same problem and just have to remember if I talk about being gay with my mom she isn't going to imagine me getting it on with another dude, though that is what I am worried and ashamed of. It is only because it is the most embarassing thing I can think of when it comes to being gay, therefore since I have acceptance issues, I think thats what is on other people minds, which in return makes you uncomfortable. It's just not the truth though.
There a lot of ways people orgasm and I'm sure other people wouldn't know just based on your sexuality. What happens behind closed doors is private for everyone regardless. I'm very happy you came out. You can't control the way they feel about it, but I don't think they will be focused on your "private" matters that much.
I kinda know where you're coming from, I've felt that way myself as recently as yesterday. In my case it was fear that I would be outed to other people that I didn't want to know yet. Yep, people are gonna judge you, but that happens to everyone 100 times a day, it's just a matter of putting it into that context. I'm judged by people because I smoke, do I care? Not a bit. They judge me because I drink, don't care. The point is people will always be judging you on some aspect of your life, granted this is far more personal, but their judgement of you is no less meaningless, it just seems important because it's such a personal thing. Don't let em get you down.
