My Parents Forced Me Out

They asked for it.

 

They may have thought something was wrong and feel bad for inadvertently doing that.

 

Aww, (*hug*)

You don't seem to have mastered the art of deception - that's OK, I'm sorta bad at it too (though I did it for 34 years....), there was nothing about that conversation that "forced you out". You could have made up something about school stress, or something like that.

But anyways, now that it's done (and what's done can't be undone, no use in running all of these "what if" scenarios in your head, I was doing that forever prior to coming out), did they accept you? I only ask because that could have a large effect on your state of mind right now.

Anyhow, I'm so sorry that happened to you :tears:

 

My parents forced me out too (although I'm not sure I'm bi) and both had the same reaction as yours. I know it feels like shit but hang in there, you'll feel a little better with time. And don't feel guilty for making your mom cry and your dad to ignore you, you did nothing wrong. Their reaction could have been worse; at least they didn't throw you out of the house. Your parents just don't understand you because same sex attraction is foreign to them and they probably think you chose to be gay. Here's a virtual hug!

 

They did not "force you out." You just blurted out what was on your mind. It sounds like very odd behavior on their part, however, to be so insistent that you share why your behavior was out of the ordinary today. Were you actually grumpy because you were upset about being gay, before this happened?

Things will get better, though. Just give it some time.

 

*hug* I'm sorry that you came out under pressure.

Hopefully your relationship with your family will turn out better.

Update us!!!!

 

Hmmm. Do you think they knew you were gay before this? It doesn't sound like it. It sounds to me that they genuinely care for you and were really worried about you. That's why they tried to force you to tell them what's wrong.

I can only imagine the things that were running through their head. I know my parents get all sorts of weird ideas into their head when I'm upset about something and I haven't told them what it's about.

So when you say that they had no right to make you do that, I would tend to agree with you. But I'm not sure that's what they thought they were making you do.

I know this probably sounds like a stupid question, but when you say you're "so incredibly hurt", what do you mean? Are you hurt as in "sad and insulted" — like your rights have been infringed — or worried about how they will handle it? Or both? I think you have legitimate reasons to select the "both" option.

And how do you think they will handle it? What was their opinion of gay people before this?

But more importantly, why were you "such a grumpy little shit" today? Or, putting it in a nicer fashion, what was bothering you today?

Sorry for all the questions, but they are the questions I've asked and had asked of me many at time. I know how you feel, unfortunately.

 

I'm sorry.

 

Just remember that your mom could be crying not because you are gay but because she knows your life won't be easy. Parents want to protect their kids from hurt feelings and being gay means you will have to deal with discrimination.

I'm sorry you came out before you were ready.

 

Well it sounds like they are (or at least your dad) is okay with it. Cut them some slack, it's a lot for them to process.

 

Well, you live with them. Listen - I used to think my parents were wayyyyy too overbearing. But they just care. It sounds like your parents care, too. Don't be too harsh on them. Give them the benefit of the doubt while you still can, ok?

 

I know this is a really hard time for you, and I'm really really sorry, but this made me laugh. Because it's true. They did ask for it, and you should tell them that. By the way, why didn't you just make something up?

 

Looks like time for some gay check... like education and breaking stereotype created by freaken media. xD

they seriously haven't met a "masculine gay" who act hetero as per, media and societal standard

 

(*hug*)

 

Sorry the "I didn't want you to have diabetes" didn't make sense to me :S Or do you have diabetes but what does that have to do with you being gay.

 

Mine "forced me out" too, but unknown to them it was a mere two days before I intended to tell them anyhow. I turned it around on them, sat their asses on the couch and laid down the law for a half hour. If you want to read that account, you can find it here:

http://http://emptyclosets.com/forum/coming-out-stories/75925-out-my-parents.html

Otherwise, just give them some time and answer their questions as they come. They have a lot to process right now, but they love you and will hopefully come around. Keep us posted!

-The Seeker

 

I'm sorry (*hug*). Your parents shouldn't have forced you into telling them.

 

maybe OP's family has a family history of diabetes so that disease might be the first thing came to the mind of the parent(s)....