Given the huge success stories others post, I feel foolish posting this, but I feel like doing it. Maybe it'll help someone else. Anyway, I made a small start on coming out by changing my Facebook profile picture to that red equality box that's been popping up all over Facebook. Admittedly, this is very small step--almost infinitesimally small. But doing anything like this on Facebook is something I'd have avoided in the past, simply because I was always afraid of calling attention to myself. ("Hmm. He's 42. Not married. And just posted something on gay marriage! He must be gay!") Hard to judge reactions so far. I am most concerned with the reaction of two people, but, frankly, after some thought I decided I'm tired of worrying about what others think. Some profiles here say "So far in the closet I'm in Narnia." That is where I have to be practically, but I think I want to start moving closer to Lantern Waste, instead of being in the middle of the Eastern Sea. On a positive note, my cousin and one of my oldest friends are both sporting the same profile picture, and one uncle "Liked" the profile picture. Which makes me feel like a real coming out will be possible one day....
You may think it's small, but it matters honestly. It makes me feel more secure in myself seeing all my friends have it. And for the record, I can understand your thoughts about not wanting to do that type of stuff for the attention it draws; but my mother is 46 has never been married and she posts all sorts of supportive things for me. So I know some people might think "He's 42, not married and supports same sex marriage, he must be gay!" But it's not like an automatic.
Good for you BMC. It's all about confidence building. I've changed my facebook pic as well, but everybody knows about me now, I just blerted out, 'I'm a lesbian by the way' on facebook. Seriously though, each little step is a step in the right direction. Even the longest journey begins with a single step. I know it might sound hackneyed, but it's true.
Good work BMC! In my mind I think about baby steps a la What about Bob?. "Baby steps into the elevator... Baby steps onto the elevator. I'm in the elevator. *DING* AHHHHHHHH!!!!" Well except without that last AH! part.
I agree as well. This is a leap forward. As we gain some experience being closeted, our "defenses" grow stronger and stronger. Maybe you didn't directly come out by this, but you've crushed layers of trusty fortifications. You've lowered your guard, exposed yourself, unclenching some tightness of your comfort zone And good for you
Sometimes you just gotta step back and appreciate the small things in life! ;D Plus when you think about it, you totally just tore down your wall of comfort and overcame your fear of self-identification and ridicule (from yourself and others)- and that's no small feat! ;D I also changed the profile on my facebook page, and one of my friends who's gay (he's like a brother to me) liked it and I was just about rolling all over my chair with joy XD So I went around liking all the profile pics of others who were sporting the equality symbol as well.
Thanks for all the nice comments! Yes, changing my Facebook profile picture is probably a bigger step than I'd given myself credit for. One definite thing: this has really made realize how desperately I want to get to the point where I can be 100% honest. That day is, I hope, coming sooner rather than later.
I'd say you are not much further in than the coats. Btw, your orientation annoys me..... the range goes up to 6.0000000000999999 :tantrum:
