So, I took a leap. I told several more friends that I'm gay and it went.... well, it didn't. They smiled, said "Ok.. Anything else?", and we moved on. :-D For the longest time, I thought it would be horrible and a disaster. Now, it turned out to be a nonevent. We're still talking with eachother, and it has been great. Just wanted to share my successful story. Hopefully, the freight train keeps rolling and doesn't hit any brick walls!
Yay! I'm happy for you!! believe me: I know the feeling: what if everything goes to hell?. So I think it's great that you could do that!
That happened to me a few times. In fact, I told one of my friends from high school once we were in university and he said, "You being gay is like me being Asian," which half-pissed me off and half had me pissing my pants because it was so funny. Anyway, I used to be annoyed when people didn't react with the high level of drama I was expecting but now I just assume that people just know because I'm pretty sure I don't come off as straight. So then there was this guy at a place I had worked for over a year and while I didn't go around calling everyone "girlfriend" or anything super-"out there," I wore a "I don't mind straight people as long as they act gay in public" shirt to work after a year of working there and heard from other people that he was all shocked and went around going "He's gay? He's gay?" And I was like, "Uhm... are you a moron? It's not like I've goine out of my way to hide it, fool!" (I said that in my non-out-loud voice, of course.)
Some people are just a little less observers than others. And some people are a little more moronic than others. And then again, some people just can't accept the fact that there are gay people, and that we are out there working in the world like everyone else, not just on cheap tv shows or bad taste jokes.
I have worked at the same place for around 4 years and pretty much assume that everyone knows (it's been public knowledge since a few weeks after I started). Yet I still find people ocasionally who have somehow missed the news. Some are to be expected since they have their heads so deeply in the sand or up their own arses that they wouldn't notice if I waved a huge banner, but some others were a surprise as they seemed to be the sort who chatted to everyone about everything and were up to date on all the gossip. You never can tell!!!
I think some people lack of intuition... If I heard someone talking the way I talk, using the words I say, thinking the way I think, I would definitely think he's gay. And yet this girl I've known for over 15 years seems to have no clue about it. So I don't think we will just move on to another subject when I tell her. She will probably feel a little startled at first, though I still think it will be a positive experience for both (cross fingers).
People just tend to assume you are straight. And they don't like the possibility of you being gay, so they (not alwas conciously) ignore the signs. My brother actually found gay porn on the computer, and he confronted me and asked me. I was vague (as usual) and ever since I leran to hide it very well. And now I'm almost sure he has no clue about me being gay. Popboy, about your friend... all I can tell you is that my thoughts are with you, and hope for the best! because in my experience (not great, but still) it happens.
