My Coming Out Story

This might not be the most exciting or dramatic coming out story on here, but I wanted to share my story with anyone who may be struggling with coming out to their parents, friends, and so on. I guess I'll start from the beginning. Sorry about this being so long, but I wanted to make sure not to forget anything.

I guess in about 6th grade is whenever I kind of started getting feelings toward guys. It wasn't anything really serious, it was kind of subtle, like I would glance at guys in my classes more than I would girls, and I liked to hang around guys more often than girls. I didn't really think of it that much until summer break of 2009. I would have been 12 years old at the time and I kind of got to thinking about it some more, and I would begin to not feel so good about myself, and tried to make myself like girls. :rolle:

In 7th grade I was questioning my sexuality, and I never talked to anybody about it. I would question whether I was gay or not and I would cry to myself :tears:, because I didn't want to be bullied or beat up or worse because of my sexuality. I had dealt with bullying when I was younger and I didn't want to do with any of that again. I had a girlfriend later on in the year, not because I really liked her, but to try to mask my feelings towards guys. We kissed one day , and I felt absolutely no spark :sleep:. I ignored it though, and went on with the relationship. :rolle: A few days later, she told me she was moving, and with me not wanting a long distance 'ship, I thought it was over. And me, thinking it was over saw myself as single. In July of 2010 I met this one guy my age at a fair, and we may or may not have been going out for a day, at least in our heads. We would go everywhere together and do everything together. And when we were riding the huge Ferris wheel at the fair, whenever our cart got to the very top, we kissed. And in that 10 seconds of pure bliss, I felt something that I have not felt with any girl or guy previously or to this date. Sadly, things didn't work out, as we both didn't want to come out or hide from people. I was sad, but I understood his logic.

A few weeks passed, and 8th grade year was about to start, and wouldn't you know, my girlfriend's family decided that they weren't moving. :***: I wondered whether or not I should go through with our relationship that I had no attraction to her anymore, or break up and tell her what happened. I chose the first option of the two, and we stayed together until September 20th, 2010, my birthday, when we decided to break up. :***: Then, a few months later we got back together, only to have her break up with me on Valentine's Day. :icon_sad: At this point, I knew I was gay and was beginning to accept it, and I felt horrible staying with my girlfriend even though deep down inside I had no attraction to her.

Anyways, freshman year comes and the only people I have came out to were people on the internet. I hadn't told anybody in real life to this point. Until the night of December 4th, 2011. We had a winter dance that night, and I decided to go with my friend Austin, one of my best friends to this date. I was contemplating whether or not to tell him this night for a good hour. Our class was dancing together and having a great night. Then, a song came on the speakers that finally pushed me over the edge to make me want to tell someone. The song is Raise Your Glass, by P!nk, Here's a link to the song:[YOUTUBE]P!nk - Raise Your Glass - YouTube[/YOUTUBE]
I still listen to that song whenever I get the chance, but anyways, back to the story.

I turned to Austin and said "Hey man, can I talk to you?" he responded "Yeah, sure, what is it." So I lead him over to a corner and thought to myself "Well this is the point of no return, I have to tell him." He asks again "What is it?" and I decide to be as undramatic and short as I can, so I whisper into his ear "I'm gay." He looks at me for a second, and I will never forget what he says next. He said "I love you man, I'll always be your friend, and that didn't change my opinion of you at all." He gave me a huge brohug (*hug*) and we went back to dancing. I let loose and had one of the best nights of my life. :icon_bigg

A few months later, I told my other best friend Brandon over XBox Live. He didn't believe me at first because he said I am the least gay acting person ever. I had to reassure him and tell him I was, and he cried for about 30 minutes before he said "I love you, buddy, and I'll always support you." I started to cry with him :tears:, and he still doesn't like it whenever I bring it up because I knew he cried but he refuses to believe he did :badgrin:

So, I slowly came out to people at school until one day it kind of got out to the entire school, to which I just responded "I'm gay. Get used to it." Everyone for the most part accepted me, and I would get the occasional weird look, but I didn't care, because I was happy. And I also have to thank all of my friends for being so supportive of me.

Anyways, about a year has passed since I told my entire school, and I'm still waiting on a time to tell my parents/other family. But it just feels so good to get the weight of living a lie for years upon years off of your shoulders, the feeling is so indescribable how good it is. But, take caution if you are planning to come out to someone. Make sure that person is pro-gay or at least not homophobic. And advice on telling your parents, if you can, wait a while before you tell them because, the absolute worst case scenario would to be get kicked out of your house. Be reminded that this is an absolute extreme, but it happens way more than anyone would even imagine. So make sure that you would at least have somewhere to stay if that happened, or wait until you can support yourself.

So this was my long coming out story. I hoped you guys enjoyed it and good luck in your endeavors, and this is Paradox15, signing out. :eusa_clap

 

I'm glad you all liked my story. I never thought it was that entertaining but I guess I was wrong XD Thanks for all the love, though. I appreciate it a lot and hopes this might help some of you who are going through the things I did.

 

I don't remember the exact circumstance, but I think earlier in the day he got some news that he didn't really like, and I guess he started crying because he was shocked and he bottled up what happened earlier in the day.