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My battle with the closet

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by veronicaslolita, May 28, 2013.

  1. veronicaslolita

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    I have been gay pretty much most of my life, and I tried to hide it for 16 years. I never had a relationship then, but I rather have the embarrassment of not kissing a girl, since I didn't want to.

    Somehow, I suddenly turned bisexual last year. I thought it might be questioning, but I genuinely felt feelings for men and women, it took a long time to process this but I have grown to love bisexuality.

    Moving on to the best bit, coming out. I tried to come out when I was 10, but it was just playground gossip that I later denied :bang: I tried again at 15, but chickened out immediately and never actually told anybody. Earlier this year, I fell in love with a straight friend (oh dear), and somehow that encouraged me to come out? I told my 3 best friends over facebook, after typing a long coming out message telling myself "I'll never do it", turns out I did!! It was a shock to me, but all I got from my friends were hugs and kisses, quite a relief.

    At school, I found being bisexual pretty cool, I wrote bisexual and proud in Japanese on my hand (I can speak a little), while people didn't know I was out, I was certainly not hiding anything. I decided to tell my best guy friend (my unrequited love), and another friend at my best friend's house (who knew), quite a story! She told them to go and make tea with me, so we did. I started telling them the situation, but other people kept walking in making it like a farce/comedy. When I told them, just at that moment, everybody walked in with party food and dancing. I was shaking but smiling. They had the funniest expressions ever, like they wanted to hug me and say 'it's okay' but couldn't. Timeless.

    After my core friends found out, I went public at school. I did a facebook status doing 5 facts you don't about me, subtly included I was bisexual, and got positive feedback, and jokes about my other 4 facts. It was nice. Nobody at school really said anything to me, but it had been spreading.

    Telling my parents was a step I planned to avoid for about 5 years. Somehow, they went camping for a week, so I wrote them a letter to read while away. They read it, my Dad reacted negatively but told me it was ok, my Mom was fine, said she could tell for most of my life (what!). It's still awkward, but I'm glad I did, since my parent's friends asked them if it was true, so thank god I told them beforehand.

    I'm not telling my family, they're touchy around this sort of stuff. But yeah, me and my friend decided to have a closet burning party at school. She wrote closet on a piece of paper, we got a lighter and burnt the 'closet', funniest moment ever.
     
  2. MixedNutz

    Full Member

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    That's great! :slight_smile: