thats so gay....

Hey Alex
I know exactly what you mean....and I can sympathise with you on this one. The way I see though is that most of the time people just say it out of habit. They arent actively thinking that something is crap...just like gays. A bit like when people say "Oh my God"....they arent actually thinking about God when they say it.....it's just an expression which has lost its initial meaning. Perhaps Im being a tad too cavalier and I can totally understand why some people are offended by its inappropriate usage.

I

 

Just reading the thread title made a little vein in my forehead pulse.

I hate when people use 'gay' as a sort of multi-purpose general insult, and especially when they go "your gay... no wait, you actually are" and think they're being original, witty and funny. Really they just make me want to punch them in the face.

 

Yeah, this is one of those things that sort of disappeared as soon as I got to college, and it's one of the things that I will never miss from high school. And you should hear the arguments people used to defend that phrase when teachers confronted them. I mean I remember one day in class the teacher said something like one third of all teenage suicides are committed by gay teenagers, closeted or otherwise, and one of the guys in the back of the room shouted out good riddance. I'm sorry that I'm ranting, but if you are a human being, gay, straight, I don't care, that statistic ought to make you wonder a little bit about our society that one third of all the people who decide that death is the best way are gay. And when that kid said good riddance, I just lost a little faith in humanity. I mean, if that kid hadn't used the expression "that's so gay" as an offhand remark about something bad, maybe that statistic would be lower because people wouldn't be afraid of being themselves. If you got this far, thanks for putting up with my built up frustrations over this issue.

 

it gets me so angry, but i can't do anything about it either.
all of the kids at my school say it because it's supposedly "cool."

 

It didnt bother me....until i was fully out.

Now, it really does. I dont know what changed, but when someone says "thats so gay" it really hits home. Sure, they may not mean aaaanything by it. Heck, ive said it before because its so ingrained as a normal phase. But every time its like a bullet to the chest. Without knowing it, and maybe even meaning it, they are saying "Gay = Bad".

You can tell them to stop, but thats really about it.

 

That's so gay is the same thing as "oh my god".
It can be the same for the word fuck as well. Fuck is a very special word that can be every type of word and my professor one day showed me it can be a whole sentence if you change the suffixes lol. It's the same with dude sometimes as well.

I think it can be the same with derivitives of the word nigger too.
(no offense)

It's like one of my teachers said. Words do not create a vocabulary, humans do. We create the words and give them meaning. Not the opposite. That's why the meanings can be transient sometimes. Honestly, I can't see myself getting upset over it. Otherwise I'd have to be upset with most teenagers and even adults. Why? Because it's already incorperated into main stream societal language and even workplace jargon. It'll fade in time when the next generation finds new words.

No one really goes around saying "mondo!" "Tubular" "Physchedellic" anymore really. You certainly don't hear that from a majority of young people. Lol Thats because each generation has their own words.

 

I find that most of the high school kids use it most of the time, but that other people can use it too. Like I am still training some of my friends to curb their use of gay adjectives, and get them to say "that's stupid" or something like that. For them it's just hard because they were always used to saying it and then I came out and having them to unlearn something is tough.

My opinion is that saying "that's so gay.." should be discouraged at an early age and that they should be taught that it is wrong. It would be a whole lot easier when they are younger vs. when they are older.

 

Honestly, it doesn't phase me. Perhaps I've been so desensitised to it or something, but I just brush off like a water off a duck's back. Think about it this way: When we call something dumb, do we mean that they are mute/unable to speak? No, we have created a new meaning for the word and it's lost its association with the original meaning (for the most part). That said, I'm not encouraging it and certainly not saying. I just think we've got bigger battles

...The word "fag" on the other hand, makes me want to bash the speaker in the head with a mallet. I'm so stongly against that word that my straight mates have stopped using it cos of me and apologise if it slips out of their mouths. I'm not sure why I draw the distinction, but I really dislike that word.

 

I'm glad we don't have that here, or maybe we do but I just never hear it.
I had an american friend over once and she said something was really gay, I found it pretty offensive and told her, she never said it again..

 

My friends do that sometimes. They'll say "That's gay!" and I usually ask them "Is that a bad thing?" and they feel bad after saying it. Same thing if my other friends call me a fruitcake I say "No shit! So what?".

 

AARGHH!! i had one of those days today. double science and for the whole two hours it was all GAY and FAG and DYKE shouted accross the table. argh! i get sooooo annoyed, and on the bus, it was all arfgh gay pie cause it died!! i mean, what is up with that!!?!?!
you have good reason to vent.

ARGH!" GAY PIE DAY!!!!

 

It didnt bother me untill I accepted the fact I was gay. Now when I hear someone say it I get pissed. I usually say something to the person but I hear it most when Im at work and I get stressed because I cant talk back to the customers

 

It used to bother me.

I don't care anymore. Why waste energy on something that only connotes stupidity?

 

Have a go at it ... I did for a while ... it soon sinks in and they make the connection ...

person 1 = "hey, you free tonight?"
person 2 = "no sorry, I have an essay to write ..."
person 1 = "omg! how straight!"

 

haha. I can see why everyone's angry it sounds like a conversation me and my physics teacher had, it's become so ingrained that I dont get angry, in fact i say it myself, he always points out that it's from homophobic origin and I argue back that I'm REALLY NOT a homophobe!
but i do sometimes do the 'that's so straight' thing sometimes just for the lols with my friends!

 

ha, im so going to do that now. how straight of people to call anything gay in a derogatry term!

 

Sorry, I used to use the word 'gay' inappropriately too. Untill I actually met my gay French teacher who was a really nice guy- he was married and everything and always gave me high grades. :icon_wink From then on, I started using words like: camp/effeminate if I wanted to say that this guy is really.... effeminate. lol

 

doesn't really phase me that much, but you could always return the favor to someone by saying "That's soooo [their name]" when something stupid happens