Belgian gay couple can't bring thier son home

That is just... horrendous... I just don't know what else to say.

 

This is just so awful. Typical Belgian bureaucracy - I know most people's dealings with them (whether Belgian or foreign like me) are beyond frustrating. I don't blame them at all for taking the kid from the family and trying to sneak him over the border.

 

Thats awful. And terribly unfair

 

I'm starting to wonder if robots with no feelings are in charge of the world. With cases like this, that's the only reasonable explanation for the actions taken by the Belgian government here.

This is a child! A child with a family! This is what human beings should want for all children!

I weep for us a species if this is what we have come to.

 

Well, as the resident Belgian, I'm at a loss for words myself.

It's pretty par for the course though. as the saying goes: "you can show a horse the water, but you can't force it to drink" and that's what happens with gay legislation. In theory, a lot of things are well-defined, but very often, papers get "mislaid" or "incorrectly processed". It happens to straight people too, but there are serious concerns that it happens to gay people more.

And the actions of the government here is typical bureaucracy too. Probably a lot of bureaucrats do see that the situation is injust, BUT without an ironclad law saying they're in the right, they're not going to risk processing a form they can't process, and definitely not do anything that might conceivably cause an international incident. It's not worth their job to them, and they have kids to feed too, after all. A robot with no feelings might be more just than a bureaucrat afraid for his and his family's income if something goes wrong.

So bureaucratic self-preservation, and possible underground homophobia in the system don't make for a good mix.

On the bright side, it's usually after media reports of such injustices that the politicians get off their lazy asses and do something, so I'm hoping there might yet be a happy end to this...

 

That's horrible, just horrible.
I hope this generates some publicity. Never underestimate the power of an angry public.

Probably a dumb question, but didn't they say they were living in France? Why does their son have to have a Belgian citizenship?

 

Well, they're both Belgians, and the nationality of the child is decided based on parentage. France (which doesn't even have gay marriage laws itself) has absolutely no legal standing in this. So all diplomatic channels have to go through Belgium.

 

Wow that's awful, and the Belgium government seems so heartless. They should be able to make an exception if there's no law against it, or base it on an other law, or at least do something. I don't know what the EU (law) says about surrogacy...

 

Exactly the same in Norway.. Surrogacy is illegal here too, so we had a few cases in Norway last year, gay couples not being able to take their child home. The government refused to help them, only said it was impossible to get the child over the border because surrogacy was illegal in Norway. The gay couples all had to hire expensive lawyers, and it took a while, even months in some cases! But they got the child to Norway eventually.

After that debacle the government just warned people about doing it. Baiscally saying, "you do this on your own, and you have no rights whatsoever, so we cannot guarantee the fact that you get to take your child home if you go through surrogacy in another country."

It's unbelievable. They refuse to change the law so that if not making it legal in Norway, than at least making it easier to take the child home if you do it in another country, but instead give a warning that basically their all on their own with no rights if they decide to do this.

What makes it even worse is the fact that, yes, gay couples are allowed to adopt here, but there is a "small" problem.. none of the countries adopting to Norway allow the kids being adopted away to gay parents! So gay couples in norway have basically no way of becoming parents, since adoption is difficult and surrogacy is illegal. On the other hand, the state has no trouble financing IVF for lesbians.. I think it's extremely sad and discriminatory towards gays.

 

Humans can be really stupid sometimes. For God's sake, it's their child! Nobody has anything to do with it.

 

Good news, everyone!

After the whole ruckus this news report caused, it was apparently "suddenly" possible to find enough politicians to sign off on the necessary paperwork to get the kid to his dads. So even if it took two years, it seems like this will have a happy end. I couldn't find a news story about it in English, but if I do, I'll link to it.

The official stance of the government now is: "don't use surrogacy in countries abroad, as this is an exception, and there's no rules governing this". Though at the same time, debates have started to create laws governing this.

So it seems Belgium will do the right thing... after exhausting all other options

 

I found one Filip. I'm very happy for the couple, and the child!
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Here's the latest update. It's long but very heartwarming.
[YOUTUBE]LX5l88uuT0I[/YOUTUBE]

 

I am so glad this story had a happy ending. Those two guys seem like a wonderful couple and it is such a relief to see that their family is complete again. Seeing them with their son is beautiful and makes me feel so excited about starting my own family. Thanks for sharing the ending to this story, olides84 .

 

awwwwwh thats so sweet. I am glad they got there son. I want to have kids with my future husband and I won't get them from the Ukraine, lol