1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

It doesnt always get better

Discussion in 'Current Events, World News, & LGBT News' started by Robert, Feb 16, 2012.

  1. Robert

    Robert Guest

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2011
    Messages:
    1,398
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    .
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    For fuck sake. Can we just all agree on this point please? I'm sick of seeing videos of white upper middle class kids telling me that its going to get better. IT DOESNT ALWAYS GET BETTER SO STOP TALKING SHIT PLEASE.


    *waits for shitstorm*
     
  2. dreamcatcher

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2011
    Messages:
    845
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    USA
    To be honest, I'm not a big fan of people telling me it gets better either. Every time I hear that I want to ask how? What did you do to make things better? What can I do to make things better? I like concrete solutions or well thought out plans as advice or support rather than people telling me it gets better and that's it... Yeah I'm sure it gets better but that's only because you're in such a deep hole that anything really is better than the hell you're living through. However, that's just me. As you can tell, I've developed a bit of dark view on life lately...

    I do think a lot of kids benefit from the it gets better videos though. Maybe for you and me that doesn't work, but others may need the support or to just see other people in the same situation as them. There is some kind of comfort in knowing you're not alone and that other people out there went through the same things that you did and came out alive and happy. So I personally think that the it gets better videos should stick around and continue doing their job.

    I get what you're saying though. But for the sake of those kids that DO need someone to tell them that things get better, I say keep the videos coming.
     
  3. b0i70y

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2012
    Messages:
    59
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Minnesota
    Dude, it's a campaign from the Trevor Project. I'm not sure how common suicide is among LGBTQ kids in the United Kingdom, but in America it's become a serious issue. Mostly it's from kids who don't understand that high school and college are not the be all and end all of your life.

    And, to be fair, you're twenty. You haven't really lived long enough to make judgements like this. Nine times out of ten, when someone grows up, and gets to choose the environment in which they live, and who they spend time with, yeah, it gets better.

    Obviously I'm not the best source for information, since I myself am only nineteen, but many of my friends in the community are in their thirties or older, and yeah, it does get better.

    -

    I mean, yeah, I can understand where you're coming from, and I'm not trying to sound like an arse, I just really think they serve a true purpose, and that in the end, it does get better if people choose to make it get better. Ultimately we run our own lives, and we're responsible for where we live it and who we live it with.
     
    #3 b0i70y, Feb 16, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2012
  4. Mogget

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2010
    Messages:
    2,397
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    New England
    Actually, "It Gets Better" was started by Dan Savage, and as far as I can tell is not affiliated in any way with Trevor. I think the project has good intentions, but it doesn't always come across well. While my suicidal ideation wasn't due to bullying, I know that being told in three to six years or more things would get better wouldn't have helped me at all, and would probably have felt like mockery. The main value I see from "It Gets Better" is the demonstration that a happy, fulfilled life as an out queer person is possible.
     
  5. Emberstone

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 26, 2008
    Messages:
    6,680
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Oregon, USA
    the point of the 'it gets better' project is not to truly get to suicidal teens, it is to get to everyone else. it is about raising awareness of the issues. it is speaking to the family and friends of lgbt teens, to highlight the fact that this is happening, and could happen to them. it is about trying to get society as a whole to see that we have to do something instead of just setting back and letting kids be driven to suicide.

    visibility helps our cause. visibility doesnt help the anti-gay faicist-milita.
     
  6. Tiny Catastrophe

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2009
    Messages:
    728
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Long Island, New York
    Things only get better if you want them to and if you make an effort to change things and be happy with yourself. Yeah society can be mean but it's what you choose to do and how you choose to react. If you sit there and say "nothing is going to get better" then nothing is going to get better. And I'm not sitting here talking out of my ass because I've been through hell in my life and spent a lot of time being miserable and thinking nothing would get better and I took my own advice and things are getting better. As for those videos, they do give a lot of people hope and that's the point. And I'm sure I'm going to get a lot of shit for what I just said but bring it on.
     
  7. Nemo39122

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 2, 2012
    Messages:
    201
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Texas
    omg....THANK YOU FOR SAYING THIS! I thought I was the only one that felt this way. I get sick of seeing all the videos of not only white middle class kids saying it gets better, but is it just me or is it just aimed at gay kids? I'm bi, does it not get better for me? What about those who are trans, or asexual, or anything else. Oh right, that's because the It Gets Better Project was started by Dan Savage...according to him bisexuality is "usually just a phase." :tantrum: :***: It should be "It Gets Better...With Exceptions."
    Ok done ranting about that before I piss anyone off.
     
  8. Curly

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2012
    Messages:
    254
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Canada
    I agree that things don't just get better by waiting for it. There are steps we have to take to try to make things better for ourselves. But I also believe in the usefulness of these videos. The important message the videos give is the message of hope and that they are not alone. It doesn't mean that people aren't out there trying to change policies and make schools an easier place. It also doesn't ask teen to do absolutely nothing or to say it is going to be a breeze in the park. It is asking people to give themselves a chance for things to get better.
     
  9. alan t

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2010
    Messages:
    310
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    ontario, canada
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Yes I agree completely. Thank you for saying this!!! God I hate those videos so much.

    But I understand that there is a certain specific audience they are targeting. The message is a good one for those people. So I guess it's a good thing to have those videos as long as there's someone out there that they are helping.

    On the other hand, it does really depress me to hear it and realize i grew up and never got to that happy place. but whatever, it if helps some people somewhere then it suppose it's worth it.
     
  10. NickT

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2009
    Messages:
    567
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Kentucky
    Sure. Let's tell people things get worse. That's a smart move.

    Get over yourself. Seriously.
     
  11. Bedroom Hymns

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 11, 2011
    Messages:
    203
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Catalonia
    I've never believed it gets better for everyone, but I think it's good to tell people it indeed does because for many it will. And it's definitely better to say something that might not be true to everyone to help some people than not saying anything and not helping anyone at all.
     
  12. Zontar

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2010
    Messages:
    1,802
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Binghampton, NY
    Eh, it's just feel-good hoohah. Maybe that's what some gay teens need, though.
     
  13. TheDude

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2011
    Messages:
    213
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Buenos Aires, Argentina
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Agreed. And what's up with that white upper middle class comment? I've seen tons of videos and there's a lot of diversity showned. Why does everything has to get racial. That's something I would never understand from the US.
     
  14. Harve

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 25, 2009
    Messages:
    1,953
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Scotland
    I don't think anyone's saying "It always gets better". Yes it's an idealistic campaign, but why not demonstrate how things could be? If it's inspirational to some then it's done a good job.
     
  15. TheDude

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2011
    Messages:
    213
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Buenos Aires, Argentina
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    My thoughts exactly. The point here is to show people that are going through a bad time to not give up so soon in life. If I'm not mistaken, the campaign began due to the increase of suicides between the gay youth. It's an attemp to show to those who are in despair, that they are not alone, that they are people out there just like them, that they do have a chance in life to make things happen and eventually found happiness.
     
  16. Kanen

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2011
    Messages:
    160
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Texas
    I don't think I've ever been more mad at this forum than I have at this precise moment. From the people who are so shocked, who are so saddened every couple of weeks when a new suicide comes to light, how can you possibly say that these videos are wrong?

    The point of the videos are to tell people that are in bad positions in life (such as I was, at one point) that there is more to life than just high school. So things don't neccesarily get easier, but when you are allowed to shape your own life, your own environment, things get better. So things still might be hard. Its not a promise for a perfect life. Its a plea. Just keep on living.

    I really don't understand the reactions you guys had. Saying you hate the videos? How can that be possible? Yes, I can understand that they might be a little annoying, but hate? You cannot deny that the videos have saved lives, that they help people. They helped me. They taught me that life is full of ups and downs, of goods and bads, and that you have to fight through the bad to get to the good. How can anyone hate that?

    No matter what your opinion on Dan Savage is, you cannot deny that what he has done for LGBT youth has been an amazing thing. I truly believe these videos save lives. We all complain about how we're sick and tired of teen suicides, and about how helpless we feel to stop them. This is a way, even if its just a small way.

    I can't remember ever being more disgusted on this forum. Like NickT said, get over yourselves. If you don't like the videos, don't watch them. Let them do what they do best - help people - and stop complaining.

    -Kanen
     
    #16 Kanen, Feb 16, 2012
    Last edited: Feb 16, 2012
  17. alan t

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2010
    Messages:
    310
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    ontario, canada
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    ok we can't edit or remove old comments so I am posting this to officially cancel my previous comment on this thread. I was irresponsible to use such extreme language. What I said up there was wrong. Sorry.
    (If a mod could delete all my comments from this thread that would be nice.)
     
  18. Paper Heart

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2009
    Messages:
    429
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    The tiny red dot in Massachusetts.
    If the campaign stopped one LGBT teen from killing themselves, then I consider it successful. That is how I see it. Maybe it doesn't get better for you, it hasn't yet for me, but to see someone hate something designed to give hope is infuriating.
     
  19. starfish

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2008
    Messages:
    3,368
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Hippie Town, Alberta of the US
    Well I have to say I am taken back by the strength of some of opinions shown in the thread.
     
  20. Alexandria

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2012
    Messages:
    199
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    NW Canada
    While I agree things dont get better on their own, I DO wholeheartedly agree with the intent and effort that people - not just 'white middle class kids' - are putting into this; even if Ive heard a lot of sour things about Savage himself. (Derek and Romaine of their show of the same name arent fond of him.) Really, the idea of success stories being told by others will help those hurting, and may offer ideas or ways for people in trouble to get out of it without such drastic means.

    However, he certainly was NOT the first to do this. Go to YT, search Rick Mercer's Bullying Rant, and you should find it; the vid was done back in 07 when Canada was going through a rash of teen suicides. *I have the link but am not sure if I can post it directly.*