funny jokes!

Discussion in 'Entertainment and Technology' started by Closetdress, Jun 8, 2014.

  1. Closetdress

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    Hear about the blond that tried to blow up her car? Burned her lips on the tailpipe!
     
  2. Argentwing

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    Lol, that's a new one to me XD.

    One I just saw a day or so ago on Reddit: What did the Kraken have for lunch?

    ...Fish and ships.
     
  3. TheStudent

    TheStudent Guest

    Why are drugs so expensive in Leeds?

    Because there's only one LSD and two E's.

    *Drum roll, cymbal bash, gets coat and exits*
     
  4. Closetdress

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    How many aholes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Doesn't matter, long as it doesn't get stuck.

    How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2, but howd they get in there?

    Yo mamas so fat when she sits around the house, she sits AROUND the house.
     
  5. TheStudent

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    I've got a book coming out soon. I shouldn't have eaten it, really.
     
  6. Miiaaaaa

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    What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
     
  7. kyfry

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    What do you get when you put Abe Vigoda and Erik Estrada together?

    Fish & Chips
     
  8. Acm

    Acm Guest

    Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

    If they flew over the bay they'd be bagels
     
  9. Argentwing

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    A priest, a rabbi, and Hitler walk into a bar.

    The bartender sees the trio and says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"
     
  10. iamjustababy

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    A man walks into a bar, he said it hurt
     
  11. kyfry

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    Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? He woke up.
     
  12. CharlieHK

    CharlieHK Guest

    My boyfriend called me a pedophile, and I'm like "that's a pretty big word for a six year old".
     
  13. RayXxx

    RayXxx Guest

    How do you make two priests fight to the death?

    -throw in a little boy
     
  14. KyleCats

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    So this wizard turns into a bar...
     
  15. Argentwing

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    You can tune a piano, but you can't tune a fish.
     
  16. Phoenix92

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    What's the difference between a black guy and a piñata?
    You can beat the pulp out of a piñata with worrying about legal issues

    ---------- Post added 8th Jun 2014 at 10:15 PM ----------

    Sure you can, just adjust its scales
     
  17. JohnB

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    How many tickles does it take to make an Octopus laugh?

    TENticles.
     
  18. Closetdress

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    How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they beat the room because its black!

    School bus full of white kids = twinky