This is my first time doing this lol.. So i guess i should start by saying I'm pretty sure I'm bi. but yeah.. So i have a friend, he's honestly like a little brother to me and we're really close. He knows I'm bi & i know he is too. We had a massive dnm about being ourselves because i always had a feeling that he wasn't straight like he said he was. He pushed it away for a while, but when i explained to him that id never judge him and that i hate seeing him lie to himself and that he doesn't have to lie to me, like it's not like I'm gonna go tell the world (this doesn't count because i haven't said his name lol) he broke down and opened up. But the other weekend he got a girlfriend and then the next time he stayed over (which wasn't long after) he started being weird and saying he lied and that he's straight & he only cuddles with me when we sleep because he wants to make me happy and he holds my hand while we're sleeping because it makes me happy (which i dont believe). So yeah he went on about it was all being a lie and it got pretty emotional.. So yeah, after that i distanced myself for a week and not long after he apologised. The next time he came over he cuddled me and held my hand when we slept, i asked him if he was uncomfortable and he said "no, i like it". The next morning i asked if he was uncomfortable and he said he slept like a baby! Ever since that, theres times where he's really close to me and it feels like a relationship and the other times its like he's trying to be distant.. but yeah so basically i wanna know, is it cheating that while he's in a relationship with a girl he tells me he loves me, lets me kiss him on the cheek, cuddles with me in bed to the point where our legs are wrapped around each other and his head is on my chest while holding my hand (interlocked fingers) ? oh and does he have a thing for me ? Last week we were talking about what my first experience with a guy, and how i enjoyed it. He's never tried anything with a guy, and i told him if he ever did to make sure he's first experience is with someone he trusts. after that he faced me and came close, but nothing happened. We ended up cuddling and holding hands that night, and as usual he had a boner lol.. Feelings or just wants to try it out ? Thank you
I think he has feels for you. He isn't doing a very good job at hiding them, it seems. He may be bisexual and likes his girlfriend too, but this girlfriend seems to be his version of denial.
You reckon.. He knows how messed up my trust issues are and how I'm scared to be vulnerable because I always fear people will walk out. He promised me he'd never do that and I actually believed him. But on the weekend we had a massive talk about everything and we agreed that these past 10 months we've basically been in a relationship. Now that he's had a girlfriend for a month and a half, we figured it was best to "end" our "relationship".. We had a thing for a while but never once kissed.. So I asked him is it alright if I just did it once, and he went with it. At first he didn't kiss back, but then he started to. Does that mean he enjoyed it? The next day he couldn't even look me into the eyes and went back to the whole distant thing. It's starting to hurt now, and I don't understand how he can hurt someone he, well, I don't know if it's love, but has feelings for. Is it because he's afraid? I just want to know.. I want that closure.. He hasn't spoken to me since its happened, even though we both agreed we'd still be brothers and nothing between us as brothers would change.. If he needs space I get it, but why punish me? He wanted this, he could've said no. So why am I the one that's staying up all night wondering what I did wrong. Did he truely have feelings or just do it for me?
i'm 100.0% positive that absolutely NO completely straight male would cuddle and hold hands with another man. other than it being a 10-second joke. he's not straight.
Yeah, I always knew that lol.. Especially after I kissed him. But why is he pushing me away? Like I know he has a girlfriend, but why did he do all that and then just runs away from it.. What am I supposed to do? It hurts to feel that he actually cared and is now distancing himself from me..
i'm assuming that he's not openly gay. honestly, he's either just wanting to experience being intimate with a guy so he knows what it's like. or he's afraid of being accepted by society. not to be negative, but if that last option is the case you're wasting your time. be with someone who wants you just as much as you want them. you mind not find it today, tomorrow or next week - but you'll find it. and when you do, all the waiting will be way more than worth it.
Yeah, neither of us are out. He's weird, one day he's accepted it and is all good with it, but obviously just with me as we're the only ones that know.. But then the next day he's "straight".. You're right, I want to move on, I'm sick of being upset over him.. I wouldn't say I love him, I just like him.. A lot. I just want him to chase me for once, he knows I'm always gonna open my arms to him if when he's ready. But I'm tired of waiting. I want him to chase me, or at least not take me for granted. He says "I love you" and I'm number one to him and that I come before his girlfriend, and some days he shows it! And then there's others where he doesn't really care.. Thank you for talking to me about this lol feels good to get it off my chest! It's being eating away at me..
