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Misinterpretation?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Pain, Jul 5, 2013.

  1. Pain

    Pain Guest

    Yo

    I'm staying in Ohio for the week with a great friend of mine, who is incidentally gay. He knows I'm not attracted to him and I'm actually seeing somebody else. He has met my significant other, and is often my ride to see him. They are friends as well.

    But, when we've all been hanging out, I have been dividing my time so as not to make either feel excluded. The friend with whom I'm staying acts reserved, won't get off his phone, and is generally quiet. I've asked if everything is ok, and the response has always been a solid, "Yes," with a tone of 'Why are you asking?'

    But here's the mushroom on the burger: even when Stephen (my significant other) and I aren't together at the moment, and my host and I are chilling at my host's house, he'll constantly bring up Stephen, using a pronunciation like that of the SNL persona, 'Steffon.' He'll ask "How's 'Steffon' doing?" "Are you gonna see 'Steffon' today?" "What are you and 'Steffon' talking about?"

    I get the vibe that my friend is jealous, and almost likes me--which I don't want. I think that he likes me because he'll use words like 'perfect' to describe my hair and my attire, constantly call actions of mine 'cute,' and quite frequently touch me, if I need to move, he needs to 'drive a point home,' or if we're on his couch playing video games.

    I know that you, the wonderful people of EC, haven't experienced this personally, but I seek advice; does he like me? And, how do I, tactfully, let him know I'm not available? I quite don't want him interested in me.

    Rather, is my friend ok, and how do I end his feeling jealous?
     
    #1 Pain, Jul 5, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 5, 2013
  2. biggayguy

    Full Member

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    Why don't you ask your host what his plans are for the day. It sounds like he should get off the phone with his friends and do something in person with them. Try to gently get him to do things with his other friends.
     
  3. empireants18

    Regular Member

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    Aww tough break! Maybe, if it's not too awkward for you, try flat out mentioning your concerns to him and talk a bit about it. If you do want to take a more subtle route, though, maybe try setting him up with a friend or something? Or maybe hang out in groups of people and see if he focuses most of his attention on you.
    Hope it works out!