1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Should I tell my mom I'm dating someone?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by xJinxedFoolx, Jul 12, 2013.

Thread Tools

Thread Tools

  1. xJinxedFoolx

    xJinxedFoolx
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2011
    Messages:
    19
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Detroit, MI.
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I'm dating this guy, I'm 16 and he's 23. We met on my roleplaying group, but I've shown interests in guys older than me before and she said she wouldn't be okay with it. I mean, we just started dating and I don't even know if it'll last, but I know if I don't tell her and she magically finds out then I'll be in BIG trouble. Should I tell her, or no?

    Before you say he is a creep, he's not. I've been talking to him for a while and he's like a big teddy bear. And he lives far away, so he's not in it for sex. (As I told him I wouldn't be meeting him for a long time.) I personally do not think age matters, that it's just a number. A lot of people think that age gap = no mutual interests, but that's not true. We have so many of the same interests, and the same views. My mom doesn't even trust my friend who is 19, I doubt she'll trust him. But I really like him. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. My anxiety is creeping in and I don't want it to ruin this relationship, because as I've said, I really like him. It's 2.5 years until I'll be 18, and that just seems like forever. Plus either way I'll be going through drama with my mom. :icon_sad:
    What do you think? And please don't tell me he's creepy, a pedophile, etc. :tears:
     
    #1 xJinxedFoolx, Jul 12, 2013
  2. wboii

    wboii Guest

    Im 16 too. & I'm going to respectfully say your mom is right.
    No the man is not a pedophile, im not saying that but what business does a 16 year old have with a 23 year old that lives far away? It doesnt make sense(to me). But before you get upset im going to say yes i have also encountered an older person that i was interested but never did i date them. I figured if they're worth it then we'll talk again once im older. Especially since quite a few of them lived states away.
    I'm just saying maybe you should consider dating another individual around your age and nearer to you. Considering the fact that you'll actually have physical contact and probably a better relationship when you're able to meet face to face.
    Anywho, that was my 2c. Sorry if i disappointed you in my response. But i hope you find a better and more appropriate relationship.
     
    #2 wboii, Jul 12, 2013
  3. HeyAshley

    HeyAshley
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2013
    Messages:
    261
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Midwest, USA
    if you just go bursting out the truth you'll probably be forced to the end the relationship. which is truly for the best. honestly, that's just not an appropriate relationship. but if you feel in your heart that you're happy and you honestly know that there's no wrong-doing taking place, i'd just keep it to myself if i were you.

    with the relationship being long distance and considering both of you are at completely different points in your life, i think you'll realize soon enough that you'll enjoy a relationship a lot more if it's someone you can physically see and someone who's at the same place in their life as you are.
     
    #3 HeyAshley, Jul 12, 2013
  4. Chip

    Chip
    Board Member Admin Team Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    May 9, 2008
    Messages:
    16,560
    Likes Received:
    4,757
    Location:
    northern CA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    He may not be creepy or a pedophile. But he might be. Pedos are exceptionally good at grooming kids and telling them exactly what they need to hear in order to win their confidence. You may well find that your 23 year old friend is really 30 or 40 or 50... it's happened many times to people, many of whom have written here about their experiences.

    Even if he's not a creepy pedo who's 3 times your age... let me put it this way: No emotionally healthy 23 year old is going to want to date someone 16. Sorry. So he's either into young teens, or he's emotionally immature.

    Your mom is right on this. The good news is that, since it's a long distance relationship, it's relatively safe. Just, whatever you do, don't be getting naked on cam for him, sending him naked pics, or anything of the like. If that has happened, it is an ENORMOUS red flag (not to mention a felony for which he could do 10 years in the federal pen.)

    Sorry to be a downer but... you'll be a lot happier in the long run to find someone around your own age.
     
    #4 Chip, Jul 13, 2013
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)