This may be the wrong forum. Please move this if need be. I'm seriously wondering if my friend is in denial or not. Like seriously, during the year, he would come up to (Friend) and offer to rub his back and had some strange obsession with laying his hands on him. He would sometimes just appear in random rooms. When confronted, he said no. Now he's texting me saying he misses me, which is all fine and dandy, and I do reply.. Half an hour ago, he sent me a video snapchat with him saying "I miss you Randall." He's either very affectionate towards friends or he's thinking stuff observing my mannerisms. I don't wanna ask him if he is because I do wanna let him come to the realization if he is gay. Should I just let figure it out or should I just tell him my thoughts? Also, based on his observations of my mannerisms and my text replies to him, could it be that he might be wanting to take this in the direction that I never thought of? I don't want to be mean to him or anything and this is his life and not mine so I have no clue how to approach this situation :help: :help:
i wouldn't blatantly just pop the question and ask if he's gay, everyone deserves to come out on their own terms. there's nothing more uncomfortable than admitting to your sexuality when you're not ready to admit it. and even if you were to ask and he admitted to it, you'd probably be dealing with someone who is very insecure. does he know that you're gay? maybe the best thing for you to do is to open up to him (if you haven't already) - then he may feel more comfortable telling you if that's the case. if he already knows, maybe vent about something gay related to him or bring up the topic. if he doesn't come out of the closet, then he's either straight or just not ready. and like i said, if someone isn't ready - don't force it.
No, he has no idea that I'm gay. It looked like he only did this to people he suspected to be gay earlier this year, so that's what arose my suspicion along with everything else in my original post. The only thing that is holding me back of opening up to him [or basically anyone of the same gender (unless they have a girlfriend)] is he might formulate an opinion that I'm coming onto him and then make him feel more insecure about himself (this may not make sense, but I have a very weird train of thought). Yeah...the last thing I want to do is make someone uncomfortable about an aspect of themselves and make it sound like I'm forcing something out of them that may not even be there.
i get what you're saying but unless you're honest with him, i doubt that he'll be up front and honest with you. when i came out to my friends, i always made it clear that i never have and never will hit on them. i just wanted them to know because i was tired of being in the closet about it. not everyone is fortunate enough to have understanding friends, but if you explain yourself instead of just openly stating, "i'm gay!" and leaving it at that - you'll probably have better results with people. who you chose to come out to is your business, but you can't expect others to be honest with you if you're not honest with them. ya know? IF he is gay, i really highly doubt that he'd be uncomfortable with you letting him know that you are. if he's straight and you thoroughly explain yourself, like you aren't coming on to him, he'll probably be understanding. and on another note, you could always come out to him and let him know that you're gay and that him being "affectionate" (find a better way to word that.) towards you makes you uncomfortable because you're attracted to men and you know that he isn't. although you don't know that, still say it - that way he doesn't think that you're coming onto him.
