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Pride necklace as conversation starter

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by HopeFloats, Aug 5, 2013.

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  1. HopeFloats

    HopeFloats
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    A woman at work showed up today in a very subtle pride necklace. It was a gold necklace with a red square pendant. The equality sign was subtley in the square. I happen to know that is definitely a lesbian and has a partner but she hasn't come out to me. (Full disclosure: I have been crushing on her for a year at least).

    I'd like to complement her on the necklace. Do you think be wearing it, she's signaling that she's open to talk about it?
     
    #1 HopeFloats, Aug 5, 2013
  2. SimplyJay

    SimplyJay
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    There's a woman I've seen working at a local store a couple times who was wearing a pride bracelet (where I live thats rare - infact she's the only one I've ever seen wear anything 'gay') The thought has crossed my mind to say something like "cool bracelet" if I ever was at her register & there was noone else around.

    In reality I wouldn't risk it since that would be basically outing myself to some random lady LOL
     
    #2 SimplyJay, Aug 5, 2013
  3. LD579

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    It wouldn't hurt to try to talk to her about it. On a related note, that sounds like a really cool necklace...

    Also, it may be best to try to get over this woman somehow, if she really is in a relationship with someone else. It may be easier said than done, but it wouldn't hurt to try once, and to try many times more.
     
    #3 LD579, Aug 5, 2013
  4. Mhin

    Mhin
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    I sometimes wear my rainbow bracelet and I love it :slight_smile:
     
    #4 Mhin, Aug 5, 2013
  5. Bear101

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    I'd ask her flat out, "That's a great necklace. I'd love to get one like it. Can you tell me where you got it from?" It would definitely open up a conversation.
     
    #5 Bear101, Aug 5, 2013
  6. HopeFloats

    HopeFloats
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    Bear101, I've been contemplating saying something just like that. I'd like to out myself myself to her and have that conversation. I've been trying to get over my crush and at this point I think all of the unspoken subtext is feeding my crush. Getting the fact of our sexuality (and hopefully the very existence of her partner) out on the table will help me get over my attraction to her. I'm also going to ask her if she has any single friends!
     
    #6 HopeFloats, Aug 5, 2013
  7. diegohrz

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    Lol; this reminds me so much of something I had happen on vacation some weeks ago.

    I haven't been out for very long and not to everyone, and strangely enough, I fear the judgement of people I don't really know well most... I was staying in a hostel in San Francisco and there was this German guy chatting with his friend outside and he was a total bear (which I like ^^); he was also wearing a purple rainbow flag tee. So because I saw a very masculine guy wearing a "gay" T-shirt, I wrongly assumed: he must be gay!

    But when I asked, very enthusiastically: are you gay TOO? He answered: no not really, I just liked this T-shirt, but I am totally cool with gay people. Furthermore, he was married to a woman. Even though he was definitely open-minded, it was still kind of weird because I already gave him the flirty eyes, so that was a bit of a cold shower :slight_smile: (awkwaaard!)

    So if I were you, I would indeed take Bear101's approach, because otherwise something similar to this might happen. Just be a little tentative about it and it'll be fine :slight_smile:. Apart from that, I think it's definitely a good idea to initiate a conversation. There is a good chance she is consciously wearing it as an ice breaker. But you'll notice soon enough where the conversation goes anyway so you go girl!
     
    #7 diegohrz, Aug 6, 2013
  8. HopeFloats

    HopeFloats
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    First things first.... I was kind of seeing what I wanted to see. She go the necklace on a trip to Italy in May & it wasn't a pride necklace. So it's a good thing I didn't center the conversation around that even though the necklace finally gave me the courage to talk to her. I just came out to her when we were at lunch out of the office. At first she didn't know what to say and just listened. Then she told "what you probably already know" and talked about how she handles her privacy at our conservative office. Then she asked I I was seeing anyone and when I said no, said she'd be on the look out for singles for me!
    The conversation helped relieve the "crush" but the attraction is still there, if that makes any sense. It's much more manageable now and won't get in the way of friendship. I'm so glad I talked to her!
     
    #8 HopeFloats, Aug 10, 2013
  9. Dublin Boy

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    I wear my 3 Gay Pride Rainbow Bracelets every day & if anyone asks me about them, I will tell them what they are & if they then ask me if I am Gay, then I will say "Yes"
    (Mission Accomplished) :slight_smile:
     
    #9 Dublin Boy, Aug 10, 2013
  10. Doshyboi

    Doshyboi Guest

    I had like 15 rainbow pride bracelets. I gave them away to people who asked or who I thought needed on n.n
    I need to get more because they are not hard to obtain here and then distribute them via wearing them!

    ---------- Post added 11th Aug 2013 at 12:35 AM ----------
    Bring it up naturally as a compliment!
    People love compliments. I think that if you are bold enough to wear something like that then you should in theory be confident to talk about it.
    ALSO: You should ask where you can get one just to be all like BANG POW and subtly sayin you are gay too n.n
     
    #10 Doshyboi, Aug 10, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 10, 2013
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