So. Basically, I came out to my mom as transgender a week or two ago. But, nothing has really happened. I know my mom said that it will take a while to schedule an appointments. It's especially hard because I have 3 siblings and they asked me not to say anything to them. While I understand, I don't. The youngest is 8 which, yeah, he barely knows that gay people exist but I don't think it's fair that they aren't allowed to know who I am. Shopping for clothes is awful, too. I could get a job so that it's my money and I choose how to spend it, I have no ride and nothing is close enough for me to work at while not having a ride. Also, it's "her house, her rules" kind of thing. She refuses to let me buy clothes that I would be comfortable in. (Luckily, I bought neutral clothes that weren't a specified gender. Does anyone else think that clothes having a gender is complete bullshit? They don't have feelings, they can't have a gender. Let people wear what they want). Even though she knows who I am, she really doesn't care for it. She has refrained from being overly noticeable about calling me one of "the girls", or "her daughter". But nothing feels right. Yeah.
So significant other and not mom, and other direction. But I feel like I've been through some of the same thing. As far as little rules and restrictions, that feel like a compromise when you agree to them, and they happen when you're too tired to fight or relieved that the other person didn't react badly. One thing I learned to do, that you're definitely well within your rights to do, is ask why. You deserve a rational reason. And a discussion on how you are going to tell them eventually. Your mom will probably not want to have that discussion or even feel like she has to. She will probably feel like you are renegotiating. She may even pull rank, and there's not a lot you can do in that situation. But I guarantee you will not regret making an issue out of this or being assertive. This could turn into one of those lost the battle, won the war situations later on when you need to take another step in your transition, if your mom knows you are going to ask for a sensible reason with whatever she comes up with. EDIT: Your orientation kicks ass
I'm sorry. I don't have any answers for you, but I really am sad for you that you are being made to feel this way.
