Met this guy online, chatted for a week or so, decided to meet up... Date was good. He was charming and friendly. I like him...we had good eye contact and pauses were filled with smiles, but I think my body language was very tense and I seemed either nervous or shy...bumbling through my answers when we talked...kinda ended it awkwardly at the end when it was clear that he was waiting for me to either hug or kiss him. I ended up just saying "It was nice meeting you". I was stupid enough to message him that I would love to see him again a few hours later... What's wrong with me? My dating skills suck :tears:
Sounds like your shy try and be more outgoing like hugging him or kissing It might be hard but eventually you will get more confident :3
Some people just happen to be socially awkward when it comes to dating. It's perfectly normal. Maybe it's just because you got shy when you first met him in person. Speaking from personal experience, it's hard to be comfortable around someone you don't really know, even if you have spoken through the internet before.
Awww don't worry, some people are good at dating others are not, I wouldn't blame it all on your part. Sometimes two people just have an awkward vibe around them, so I wouldn't say it is your fault, but either way good luck in the dating world, hopefully you won't need it!
When you're a klutz (like me) humor should be the weapon in your arsenal. Comedy relieves a lot of tension caused in most situations. Lighten up the mood with a "Sorry I don't seem to get out much do I!" or "Sorry I acted so dumbfounded. In my defense though, your sexiness would dumbfound even the most intelligent person!" People like when you can laugh at yourself. (Trust me!) It comes across as charming and breaks the ice.
Dating is a journey and a mature person who is serious about finding a relationship will give it 2-3 dates before they decide you aren't what they are looking for unless they know immediately on the first date that you two will never work out. A lot of people are shy on first dates, especially from online dating. This is pretty normal. I would say to you though to try and keep the contact you have with a potential date to a minimum before the actual date so that when you two do get together you will have something to talk about. Sharing your entire life story with somebody before you ever meet often times will end up with a stale first date with not a lot to talk about because you've already written each other a novel. Which will make a second date not so appealing and end something that could have been. You want a spark on the first date and a lot to talk about so don't talk too much before your first date! As far as messaging somebody after a first date that you would like to see them again. There is the old school "3 day rule" that says you should wait 3 days before you contact the person you just went on a date with before asking them out again. This isn't a hard and fast rule and not something I subscribe too. There is no magic number of hours or days that you "need" to wait before making contact again. The important part is the message, just a simple message that you had a great time and it would be nice to go out again and leave it with a take care is how I do it. You just want to make it simple. If the other person is interested they'll contact you back. If it feels like the date is going really well definitely try and secure a second date on the first date.
So what if your dating skills suck? They will get better with practice. Hang in there. None of us are born great at anything. Everytime you do something you get a little better. Learn from it. Maybe write it down in a journal. Lean in more. Take your pants off. ( just kidding) Dating is a numbers game. Your "type" of guy is out there. What's cool is when you are his type. Just wait for the fireworks then!
Don't worry about it too much... you want to talk about bad dating skills, I could totally write a book. It doesn't help that I'm kind of an awkward person to begin with and I have no filter when it comes to what I say. The scenario you spoke about was the exact thing that happened with my boyfriend and I on our first date. We've been dating for a year, been official for 2 months... and we laugh about it now. In fact, we were just talking about our past dating lives and I asked him the most awkward date he's ever been on... it was the one he went on with me. (The second one was pretty awkward too and I totally ruined what was supposed to be our first kiss...) This may be trite but just be you and don't worry about the rest... honestly, it's about the best thing you could do.
Thanks for the comfort/advice, everyone!(&&&) I'll just suck it up, cry myself to sleep, wake up to pig out on something fatty, cry myself to sleep again, and learn from this:lol:
I've also heard a lot of dating gone wrong stories (one of which involved a guy peeing on a girl to unfreeze her) and they often get married. Just remember there's always someone who is worse at dating than you so don't feel too bad. :lol:
Ah, I think you'll get better with dating as you go on more dates and have more experience knowing how to act and react. I'm really bad at dating too, lots of awkwardness! But that's why I like to give my date the impression that he is in control and dominant, to take the burden off myself of figuring out what to do.
