1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Straight friend or not...?!

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by thatsconfusing, Sep 7, 2013.

  1. thatsconfusing

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2013
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Hello guys,

    I've been reading a lot on this website but never wrote anything but here I go. I've been starting hanging out with a colleague at work for quite a while now (1-2 months) and it's really weird. I just wanna know what you guys think.

    First of, i'm 27 and i'm bisexual. Nobody really knows I like sleeping with men.
    He is 21 and ''straight'', has a girlfriend for 7 years now and seems to be in love with her. She lives in a different city for now though. He is an ex football player and look/act very straight.

    Anyways, we started getting along together at work. We actually became friends really fast. We have the same sense of humor and like the same sports. After a week or two I would say, we started going out for drinks with our mutual friends from work. I didn't suspect anything from him when we went out those few times with our friends.

    It kinda changed like 2-3 weeks ago when we became really good friends . At work, he stays with me until i'm done my shift, we drink beers, laugh, just having a good time. We talk about anything. The weird thing about all of this is that he started saying gay jokes to me. He stares at me in the eyes and I do the same to him. I usually blink away first because that makes me shy and I don't really know what he thinks.

    He came to my place a couple of time for a few drinks. Each time when he came it was weird. He would stare at me, would always grab his dick like it's itchy all the time or something. He says stuff like, why don't we go in your bed and cuddle and I always answer yeah sure let's do it and he's like no i'm just kidding. He also says stuff like we should just have sex and i always reply hell yeah would be sweet but he replies no way a guy will ever touch my dick.When we talk he always stares at me in the eyes and you know, it's not like that with ''usual straight guys''. Sometimes i feel like he's waiting for me to make a move and I kinda try but he always shut down the door.

    Yesterday we went out again and he started telling me that he thinks i'm gay (as a joke) and saying stuff like ''i don't care if you are, as long as you don't hit on me... noo man i'm just kidding haha'' ....... He slept over at my place because we were both tipsy and he couldn't drive. We talked for at least an hour before we went to bed. When bed time as came, I offered him to sleep in my bed since it would be more comfortable than my couch. He declined.

    Today, we went shopping at the mall and i've never seen a straight guy shopping like this before. He wears only this brand or this brand. He likes shoes. He doesn't wear anything and he knows every friggin store. Tonight at work he was really always touching my nipples, saying stuff about my cock all the time.

    I don't know if he's just really reallly nice to me or like he feels I might be bisexual and he would like to try but he is scared to ask or something. He's just different than my others straight friends....



    What do you guys think?

    Thanks a lot!

    Sean.
     
  2. James1991

    James1991 Guest

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2013
    Messages:
    37
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Seattle, WA
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    The fact that he has a girlfriend whom he loves is a big indicator that you are looking into it wrong, but on the other hand, his behavior is very atypical. I'd say there's a decent chance that he's at least curious. Don't outright make a move, but let the friendship grow a little more so he knows talking to you is safe territory and one night when you two are alone, maturely bring it up, "am I reading this wrong, or is this what's going on.." And if you get the idea that he is interested, drop it subtly but surely that yes you're interested as well. But him having a girlfriend complicates it a bit; DO NOT make a move/do anything with this guy if he is committed to someone else. That makes you a cheater, and let's face it, no one likes a cheater :grin:

    Its important you tread lightly, its a very delicate Situation

    ---------- Post added 7th Sep 2013 at 07:46 AM ----------

    Something I forgot to mention: the fact that you work together makes this situation even more complicated and makes discretion all the more important. Should it turn out that you were wrong in your assumptions and he responds like a douche, he could file a sexual harassment complaint (keep in mind that the incident doesn't have to happen in the workplace for him to file a complaint). Its so so SO important that you be absolutely sure of yourself before you do anything, and if you do, you need to act with indisputable integrity
     
    #2 James1991, Sep 7, 2013
    Last edited: Sep 7, 2013
  3. nkwacky

    nkwacky Guest

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2013
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I feel that he is just a tease. I have a very similar best friend in my life. I am really into him, and he fliers back with me even in front of his girlfriend. His girlfriend teases him about being gay for me all the time.
    Back to your story, your buddy has an idea you have the hots for him, and he enjoys the effect he has on you. He likes the attention he gets from you, and of course, he likes being friends with you.
    While I will suggest that you continue being friends with him, you need to put your love elsewhere. I've been on this road, and believe me, it only leads to heartbreak.
     
  4. James1991

    James1991 Guest

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2013
    Messages:
    37
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Seattle, WA
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    After reading it, i'd say trust that guy's advice more ^^^^
     
  5. MrSmooth

    MrSmooth Guest

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2013
    Messages:
    287
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Michigan
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I think you should leave him alone he's straight and has a girlfriend, Don't mess with straight people that can get you in alot of trouble, Just saying
     
  6. thatsconfusing

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2013
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Thanks for the replies guys. I was actually just curious about what you guys have to say about this or if you guys have experienced something like this with a friend.

    I am certainly not trying to date the guy since it would be way too complicated for both of us at work and with our mutual friends. I'm just hoping for some fun with him...

    I just feel like he isn't 100% straight, that is all. :slight_smile:

    Has any1 experienced something like this and made a move ?

    Thanks!