Relationship with father...

I love my dad; but we have nothing in common, spend next to no "time together," and his ignorance and ignorant attitude towards many issues -- including sexuality -- irritates me to no end. But he works hard to support our family, so I can overlook all that, although our relationship seems to be growing more and more distant...

I personally think the "nurture" aspect of sexuality is BS (pardon my abbreviated profanity).

 

This opinion has been fabricated as a cause of homosexuality in the minds of an unreasonable amount of people in society; though in reality, it simply doesn't sense, psychologically. Even if we are going to entertain the idea that the presence of a man and woman in the lives of children could have an effect on their sexuality, it would still be the opposite of common belief.

Its just like the idea of molestation or rape by the same sex turning an individual homosexual. The most common response to pain, bad relationships, and traumatic memories is not longing, but resentment. If one were to argue that lacking a gender in a parental relationship would have an effect on a child's sexuality, the only possible route would be to push them to prefer the gender opposite of that parent.

The importance of gender separation was birthed by society; psychologically, the brain doesn't work like that. Its much more logical. The subconscious is program to avoid anything it associates with pain and negative experience, regardless of what the Brady Bunch tells you about having a mommy and daddy. So, if we were to belief in this theory, it would only work in a way that men without fathers would be less likely to be homosexual, and woman without mothers feeling similarly.

 

My being gay was not the result of my (bad) relationship with my father. However, my spending 28 years in denial most certainly WAS.

 

I hate my dad, hes an alcoholic, workoholic, who would want nothing more than my little brother and I to be dead.

 

Father dearest doesn't exactly score any points in me or my brothers lives in any way...

 

I voted "good." It was far from perfect, because two strong personalities locking horns is not a pretty sight. About a handful of showdowns, which I can count on one hand, are hard to forget. However, in between the fights, we got along pretty well. He was interested in what I was doing, for the most part, was cool to most of my friends, liked to go places with me, and had a pretty good sense of humor. Overall, I got along with him better than with my mom, for whom nothing was ever good enough.

 

I voted perfect, because I love my dad and we really do have a wonderfully strong bond. That being said, I sometimes wonder if he could EVER accept my sexuality. :/

 

Wouldn't say it's bad, but I'm still kind of antsy around him. I don't have the urge to tell him personal stuff. Haven't come out to him. Don't plan to.

 

As long as we are talking about football, deer hunting, duck hunting, and his business trips everything is just fine. Get it?

 

Good. I love my dad and we have a good relationship. It used to be like perfect, but a lot has changed. I probably wouldn't turn to him if I had a problem. He doesn't yet know I'm gay.

 

I think it's more likely that gay people would feel distant from their fathers because they are likely to have less in common with them than a straight son would, rather than the other way around (being gay because of their distance).

Personally, my father and I don't hate each other, but we've never had a strong relationship. It's kind of a shame looking back, and I guess I wasn't the most receptive son, but I also think he wanted me to be interested in things he liked rather than trying to take much of an interest in things I liked.

 

its shit.

 

Haven't spoken to him in 24 years, could be dead for all I know.

 

My dad doesn't yet know about my sexuality, however my hobbies & interests are way different to his so we don't have the strongest relationship.

 

We don't spend much time together, and when we do we don't really talk about "important" things. Forever, I wouldn't say our relationship is bad - it's more of being pleasantly neutral.

 

My relationship with my father is nonexistent. He's done some horrible stuff to me and my family, and I'm not interested in having any sort of relationship with him. He's been trying to get back in contact with me, but I shut him down (unless he physically visits and I'm forced to be in his company). Even when he was around a little bit when I was younger, he took much more interest in my younger sister (who wasn't even his daughter...) than he did with me.

 

My dad (not my father who I've never met), sexually molested my sisters, raped his business partners grandaughter, emotionally abused my mother and myself, and defrauded various banks. I leave the nature of our relationship as an exercise for the reader.

Fortunately, he's very dead now.

Todd

 

aw that's horrible /: