I go away to school and its a good distance from home so I cannot come home all of the time, generally once, or twice a month... When I am at school I miss my girlfriend like crazy, I cant even focus on what I am doing a majority of the time and the anxiety is really taking a toll on my health.. I am actually going to transfer home next semester because I personally cannot live like this.. this decision was not only based on missing my girlfriend, I have severe anxiety among other things (ocd, add) and its really hurting my health... However the problem is that I cant bare to hear how sad she is when she calls me or when I get the texts saying that im not there, or that she wishes I could be there to hold her etc. I have even heard her crying on the other end of the line and it just destroys me inside, and I feel so horribly guilty about it and if I tell her that, then she gets upset because im mad that she misses her girlfriend or im mad that she loves me etc. and I also really don't want to argue with her but I cant take it. I have been sick for three weeks now and having panic attacks and I cant sleep or eat.. I don't have a therapist here at school, and my mom is just getting worried because she knows how my anxiety gets (also she doesn't know im bisexual making it a bit more complicated and adding to my anxiety as well) So basically idk what to do, or what to say or how to handle the situation anymore.. I need to be healthier or at least manageable.. mostly I don't know how to be there for my girlfriend and in the past I just shut down and close her out but that doesn't work.. sorry for the length of my post I just need any advice anyone can give.. thank you
Have you tried meditation or other techniques to calm your nerves? If you're interested, try doing zazen (seated Zen) meditation. It really helped me when I was far from home at a stressful internship.
I have some breathing techniques I try, usually fail at because I get myself so worked up, I will look into your suggestion though I haven't heard of it
Long distance relationships can suck. Maybe you two could do Skype movie nights when you're away or something, or a book club with just the two of you. It's easy to focus on the negative emotion of missing each other and forget to balance it out with good stuff. I hope it gets better for you.
