Hi~ This doesn't concern me, but rather a friend. However, she is REALLY upset about the situation and I would like to get some advice as I have no clue what to tell her. My friend went to a party during frosh week. Nothing extreme, there were a few people drinking and such. She started dancing with a guy who she kinda knew. (She had met him and his friend at other frosh week activities). He seemed a little dazed but not falling over drunk or anything. Suddenly, he reached over and kissed her. This was her first kiss, so she pushed him away and told him angrily that it was her first kiss. The guy apparently got an odd look on his face and then said that he had a girlfriend. My friend got really upset after that and the guy apparently looked like he felt bad. He gave her money for a bus ticket and said he would tell his girlfriend what happened. That was three weeks ago. Since then, my friend says she hasn't been in contact or anything but thinks about the guy and what happened all the time. To make matter more awkward, his friend (Let's call him G) sits behind her and tries to talk to her a lot. <- The friend doesn't seem to know what happened. The friend and her are also in the same club. As my friend and G were putting up posters, a girl came over talked to them for a bit and said "Oh you two are going out right?" My friend denied this. Now my friend is really upset though, worrying that she is giving the guy's friend (G) the wrong vibe. She is also worried that things may get awkward between the guy who kissed her and G. She doesn't know what to do as G sits behind her everyday and is in the same club so it is hard for her to ignore him. Any ideas how to diffuse the situation? Or at least make it more bearable for my friend?
A "first kiss" isn't like virginity in meaning "first contact whether you like it or not"; it means the first time that you do it with feeling behind it. I'd try to reinforce the idea that it was the guy who kissed her, not the other way around. So she can still say it's her first kiss if she does it to somebody she loves.
People don't always kiss for romantic reasons. For example, in some cultures, people greet each other with kisses. For all she knows, her "first kiss" might have been from her mother (or some other family member), when she was born. A first kiss is generally implied to mean the first romantic and consensual kiss you experienced. What your friend experienced doesn't count for much, at all.
Thanks for the advice thus far on the kissing matter. You both bring up very good points. What do you guys think about the guy's friend though? What should she do about him? (someone thought they were a couple and she worries he is getting the wrong idea). Should she try to ignore him or act like nothing is wrong???
Your friend is going to have to master the art of friend-zoning lol. She could prevent making things even more awkward (by dodging his unwanted courtship) and tell him no when he tries to initiate the "feelings" talk. About the kiss, your friend should feel better and almost forget once she gets the chance to kiss that special someone. Unrequited love often seems to end sadly. :lol:
I never understood the purpose of saving your self for the right person, good lord if i did that i would be such an old virgin. I guess all this could be prevented if she stopped going to parties, people do get drunk at parties and do stupid stuff.Wait until she goes to College and parties over there and dealing with drunk people its a whole different animal unless shes planning to stay in her Dorm room.
