I don't know what to do. I love my family I really do, but the more I'm around them, the unhappier I get. We disagree on religion, they are hard core Baptists, I believe all roads lead to God. They are racist, sexist and homophobic. I don't know what to do. I'm maybe two years from leaving the state and the longer I'm here the more desperate I get. I love my family and I don't want to just cut them out of my life, I feel like I own them because they have always supported me in everything I've done thus far. Every time I'm home all I hear is how people like me are stupid, and godless and horrible, horrible people and it's driving me insane. I don't know what to do. Help?
Maybe you need to give them an ultimatum that you will not stay in touch with them unless they can fully accept you. You don't have to accept their hate just to get some of their "love."
I'm not out to my family at all. It's only recently that my mother even found out that we disagree about politics. I'm really scared because this is what they are saying before they know about me, what would they do or say if I were to come out? I hate being so scared of what my family thinks, but I don't want to loose them.
When you get the chance you should try to be either living some where else or financially stable (preferably both). Then I'd suggest that if you want to come out then come out to them. You will be separated from then by distance so they will have time to mourn the "loss" of the conservative heteronormative child they envisioned of having. Most families do turn around eventually. Some never do. But why should your life be put on hold because of their illogical opinions? It's not fair to you to be burdened with so much negativity in your life. It's not like we choose our family. We're born into them. Now it's their choice whether or not they want to accept you as you are.
