Ok, so I've had a few issues with my parents in the past (not to do with me being gay) and things started to get better so I tried to block all of that out so that I could get on with my life. however, now its like all the things from the past keep coming back and demanding my attention. I cant sleep at night and my concentration at school is awful. My auntie suggested counselling. I have agreed but am a little sceptical. Also I was reluctant to have it because I wanted to prove to myself that I was over my issues but I don't think I can move on until I sort them out. I guess I'm just scared to bring up the past in case I cant fix it. If anyone has had counselling and doesn't mind saying then does it help?
Depends what you want out of it. If nothing else it will help you understand more about yourself. IF you let it. Once you start talking about things, you realise what is hidden underneath. The stuff you didn't know worried you. The things you thought were dealt with or the things you pushed so far down you half forgot about them. It's hard work, it certainly isn't a lot of fun and it can be scary if you don't like opening up or talking to strangers. BUT if you let it work, it can help a lot. It is worth mentioning that while counselling with help you understand what the problems are and what you are feeling, it might not do you much good in terms of dealing with deeper issues. If it's just stuff you needed off your chest it's great, but if you have real issues that need work, you may need more...depends on the person you see!
You're right: you can't change the past. But you can change how it affects you and how you do things in the future. Counseling can be one of the best things you ever do for yourself, trust me
Thanks guys this helps a lot. I'm just the master of talking myself out of things. I never wanted to have counselling because I didn't want to admit the past had affected me badly enough for me to need it. I hope it helps because at the moment I feel like my future is going to be dictated by my past and my background. Also im writing a book (or at least attempting to) but Im not telling my mum. im not even telling her about the counselling because she seems to have put up this wall and erased the past from her memory to avoid admitting she ever did anything wrong. But she is a different person now and bringing it up would hurt her feelings. be honest - would it make me a bad person to write a book with her in it and not tell her? I already feel as though im lying just for getting counselling.
I found that counseling has helped me just to get things out of my head. I have a theory that we can't always organize our thoughts and emotions and being able to verbally vocalize them it is very helpful in understanding ourselves and the things that might be bothering us. I know it can be scary, but for me after my first session I look forward to my next sessions because it's my weekly unleash time
For a lot of people, writing is a way for them to work through things in their heads. It's no different than a diary, song, poem, or painting in that regard. Nothing wrong with that.
