Hello forum, I just reread my post and I notice that I ramble like the teenage girl that I am I am sorry, but I need to get this off of my chest. I'm dating a christian girl that has been out to her parents and some of her friends. She used to be not okay with who she is. Now she can say she has accepted herself. We've been dating for a while. We're long distance (2 hours traveling apart) and see each other one time or two times a month. We have been dating since February and really like each other. I know she likes me back because we've promised each other to not date anyone else. We've made plans for January. I will see her again in three weeks. Last week, a day after I visited her, I asked her where she thought things were going. Because she was eager to make plans, she wants to see me whenever she can, and she had asked me whether I was into her before. But she didn't reply to my text because she was going out, which is understandable, and she sent me later that she would call me on Wednesday. Things didn't go as planned, and she would call me 'sometime'. She has had plenty of time, I've had plenty of time, but she didn't call me this week. Tonight we've made plans to see each other again, and she didn't touch the subject, and I realized she didn't want to talk about it. So she really likes me, she wants to date me exclusively but she doesn't want a relationship. Is it because I'm going too fast? Is it hopeless? I want it to be something in the future. I don't care if it takes years, but I would like to have at least some certainty. Or am I just clueless at dating. :icon_redf Oh, the reason why we cannot see each other more, is because we have very busy schedules. It is impossible for us to just drop by. We have done that, but that has resulted in either her or me spending 4 hours traveling for 3 hours of being together. Thank you for reading this!
It seems like you're asking us (EC) the questions that you should be asking her. Sure, you could be moving too fast, but it's really not for us to judge. Just talk with her. See what she thinks and respect that. Some people just take more time to get used to the idea of dating, and sometimes they have relapses where they go back on what they previously felt/said. If she doesn't wanna talk about it, give her a bit of time. Be patient, but don't wait forever. She should know that communication is a crucial part of a relationship.
Long distance relationships can be very tricky for some people, but if the effort is there on both ends then I think it can workout. My girlfriend lives 30 minutes from me and geez, I thought that was far However, I am always the one driving and our schedules are very conflicted as well. I mean, they say that "Absence makes the heart grow fonder", but it can also tear what you have apart. I think the anticipation of seeing my girlfriend is exciting, and I am always nervous as hell to see her, which is a good thing to me. I was starting to lose interest due to the fact that I cannot see her as often as I'd like, but I have kids. I'm only available two days out of the week, so it is very challenging trying to spend with her. To me, it sounds like your girl may be having a difficult time with the distance between you and her. You should try to Skype her often, talk on the phone/text as much as possible to keep the lines of communication open. Not only that, I think you and her really need to talk about the status/future of your relationship. And this should be done as soon as possible, good luck!
Hello, @pinklov3ly I wish you all the luck! Your situation is not ideal, but I can see you both make it work! I think I'm just upset because it's obvious that I want more than her. She is willing to plan dates with me, even months away, which is a good sign (the effort comes from both sides), but things don't progress. At all.. She definitely likes me to some degree, but I can feel that she won't define anything. I wanted to send her an email about what I really think but I'm afraid that will make her run away from me. So I don't know what I should do now. I don't want to mess things up. I guess I should mention that I have some abandonment-issues. I have a fear that the people that are close to me will abandon me. I want her to clearly state that she won't leave me. So her not being clear makes it hard for me to act rationally. That's why I wanted advise. Thank you for giving me some!! @ TJ I have come to the conclusion that I am definitely going too fast for her. I want to know why but there isn't a way to ask her without scaring her. So I've decided for the time being to give her some time, even though it kind of hurts me. Thank you both for replying! I really needed some advise :icon_bigg
