If there’s anything my friends know about me; it’s the status of my love life. They know that I’ve always been single and that I really want to find love (not desperately of course lol). Whenever I crush on someone I always tell them about it (btw there were only three major crushes). Through the years my friends have pretty much given me all the possible clichés out there, to name a few they’ve told me that I should be patient, and that I would find love when I least expect it, and that I should be more optimistic and hopeful. With that being said, lately I feel as if my friends themselves have little to no faith in me. I mean I like it when my friends are honest with me, because it can help me grow as a person, but I think there’s a fine line between being honest and being a tad insensitive. When I told my friends about my recent crush one of them tells me “you always go after guys you can’t have”. While my other friend had already predicted that I would get my hopes up, find out that he’s unavailable, and have my heart broken. Even though that technically did happened, I just don’t know what to think anymore… does that make me predictable, or just an overall pathetic person “desperate” for love… was it right of them to tell me those things?... or am I just being overly sensitive?…
I think they're just trying to help. They want you to find love, I'm sure, but they don't want you to get your heart broken. And from my own experience, love does find you when you least expect it. Also, if your friends tell you someone's bad for you when you do find a relationship, I advise you listen to them. Other people can often be more perceptive about our own relationships than we are, especially in your first relationship. I'm telling you all this because I wish I would have listened to all those times people told me things like that, so if I come across that way, I'm not trying to be insensitive.
Try to think as being sensitive as your strength – not as your weakness. The only person whose opinion matters when it comes to your relationships is YOU, because you’re going to be spend most of your time with that person, and you’re going to pick that person based on YOUR likes and interests. But it seems that your friends not being supportive as you’d like (or measuring up to that “friend” definition) seems to be what’s bothering you. Better to speak to your friend about it and let it be awkward or uncomfortable for a little while than losing those friendships because there was a lot of buried anger.
@justjade For me I know they want me to find love but it also kinda feels like they automatically expect that it won’t go well in the end like I'm doomed to fail. Oh and don’t worry what you said wasn’t insensitive; when the time comes I would love for my friends to give me their opinions of my partner, kind of like a screening or something lol. @tex st Your kind of right, I mean I don’t really have any sort of expectations when it comes to friends, but yeah I don’t feel like I have their support in a way. I think I will talk to them, but not just yet, mainly because they don’t seem to want to talk at the momment.
