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Confusing relationship

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Louise1, Nov 17, 2013.

  1. Louise1

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2013
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    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    All but family
    So...after finally coming to terms with my sexuality I met a girl online. Neither of us had told our parents about being gay although other people did know. We also both live in a different city to our parents and had never been with a women before.

    Anyway we had a first date and this led to many more. Since then I have stayed at her house a number of times, we have cooked each other dinner and been out for meals and drinks. When out in public we will hold hands and kiss and all my friends/everyone at my work knows about her. We have also slept together on a number of occasions which makes me even more certain about how I feel.

    Now, the other night at hers I mentioned telling my parents and she said she has no intention of ever telling hers as they would freak out.

    Now, my problem is I don't know where we stand - as in whether we are a couple or not. As this is all new to both of us I don't want to push things and make her uncomfortable. At the same time I would like to be as open as possible to everyone (including my family). This is a bit tricky when I don't know whether we are even dating or not. Also if we are dating am not sure I can do it without her parents knowing...

    What do people think? Any advice?
     
  2. HopeFloats

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2013
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    Location:
    US
    You can't control her relationship with her parents or her coming out process. That being said, if family relationships are important to you and you expect to be included in a partner's family life eventually, you can make clear your own expectations / desires.

    And you can tell your family about her - and introduce them- even if she is not ready to tell her family about you. The status of her relationship with her parents doesn't affect whether or not you and she are "in a relationship."