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How likely is he to get offended?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by gingerincloset, Nov 23, 2013.

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  1. gingerincloset

    gingerincloset
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    Location:
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    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    So there is a guy I think is kind of cute who works at a pet care store I frequent. I am not sure if he is gay or not, my best friend thinks he is but she isn't sure either. I literally go to the store if I don't have anything to do to talk to him if he is there. I feel like the only thing that could explain it as it is would be Lindsay Lohan in Mean Girls where she asks for help but he is completely wrong. This guy has minimal pet care knowledge but I think it really cute when he tries lol.

    My dilema: I don't know if he is gay, and I don't know how he will take it if I assume so and flirt anymore with him or try to ask him out. It is a small town so it could get out relatively quickly if he were to complain to a coworker who complains to a friend who continues the process until someone finds out that shouldn't know. Given that none of you know him, taking a shot in the dark, how likely is he to flip out and get offended?

    I know it is a really vague question and I am expecting quite a few "Go ahead!"s and "you'll never know unless you ask" but I am gearing this question towards people who have been in this situation themselves. Feel free to respond even if you haven't though, I welcome all thoughts.
     
    #1 gingerincloset, Nov 23, 2013
  2. stumble along

    stumble along
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    Considering that you live in a small town I texas...
    Stay friends
    Maybe ask him to do something like play a sport or watch TV or play video games or go workout or play yahtzee etc.

    I know a guy who doesn't know as much as me about marine life care and his tank looks better than mine (and by mine I mean my dad's who doesn't really care and I'm left to do it but I don't have money so) which makes me green with envy but what can I do lmao *cries*

    Um, relevance, okay... I also had the biggest crush on him way back 1.5 years ago and now he's just a bro though I still secretly hope he's gay just so I have a spotless gaydar... yeah that's the reason.
     
    #2 stumble along, Nov 23, 2013
  3. Silver Sparrow

    Silver Sparrow
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    Is there any way you can ask him about queer characters in pop culture, or mention a celebrity who is out?
     
    #3 Silver Sparrow, Nov 24, 2013
  4. Gingerblond93

    Gingerblond93
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    Hi fellow Ginger, nice to meet you. If I was you and really liked this guy, I would continue to pop into the pet store and chat with him. I would innocently get to know what he likes, his hobbies, activities etc... At some point, when you get to know more about him, for example, say he likes to bike, play tennis or hike or um he likes cars. You can invite him to do any of those activities, go biking, play tennis, go go a hike or go to a car show. Become friends first, and as you spend more time with him as a friend, you will eventually know if he is gay or bi. Also trust your gaydar, it sounds like he is already giving you vibes that he is gay, but he may be in the closet too.

    As you know from my post, I met my bf at a car show, we hung out for a while as just friends and worked on his car. All along both of us not knowing what the other was thinking, we were each hoping the other was gay. As our friendship and trust in each other became stronger, we eventually came out to each other and our friendship became a partnership where we are best friends and lovers at the same time. But had we not had that friendship first, we would have never become partners.

    I hope it works for you. Don't give up.
     
    #4 Gingerblond93, Dec 2, 2013
  5. resu

    resu
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    Yes, first try to get to know him as a friend by seeing him outside of his work, and if things don't work out, you won't have lost much except some time.
     
    #5 resu, Dec 2, 2013
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