Well, theres this guy (Ive made post about him previously)I like him and ive made it evident I like him anyway and every way possible without saying the words "I like you" (I've even walked home with him) I have no clue of his orientation but I always catch him looking at me and he always tries to find something to talk to me about, he gets visibly annoyed when I talk to girls but never speaks about it. So I asked him if theres any girls he liked the day I walked him home and he told me that he's not in school for that and wants to focus, I thought I got the gist and was over analysing what wasnt there and tried to avoid him or 'give him space' but now after the weekend he seems to be trying to talk to me more and I think I see him looking at me at least once every 30 seconds and I'm just SO CONFUSED. I'm probably still over reading this but he's confusing me so much and I just wish I could tell him I like him but, I dont know if hes interested in guys and If he isnt, he might tell people that I am gay and that isnt really how I want to identify myself and not at this time anyway. My attempts to leave him made him try and get closer and my attempts to get closer make him defensive, Its so confusing, if he wasn't so cute and stuff I'd just ignore him. Please help, Im confused. :bang::tears::tantrum::rolle:
Well, from what you say I don't think you are over reading things. He's definetely interested in you, in some way. My only advice is to get to know him better, make him feel comfortable, you've said you've made it evident you like him, but you think you could it make it even more obvious? Ask him to dinner, in a casual way, for instance one day that's it's just the 2 of you, tell him: "Hey I gotta go, im gonna grab something to eat, wanna join?" Let him know you are going anyway but would like his company, that way doesn't sound like a date. Once there keep being friendly and pay for him, this is something a regular straight friend wouldn't normaly do, so he should take the hint, but at the same time is something that doesn't compromise you that much or your sexuality, if things go bad and he starts talking you could always dismiss it as foolish and claim you were only being nice. So, just be nice, get to know him, let him make the first move but prepare the field for him, you know? Make it easy for him. Oh and very important if he does start talking, which I don't think he will, when questioned about it just laugh about it, don't spend much of your time denying it as this usually only gives more strenght to the gossip. Hope this is helpful. Good luck! Diego
Thanks, I think I need to get him alone, cause that seems like when he's easiest to talk to and I might ask him to study or something. Thanks so much for the help!
Casually bring up LGBT rights in general, and see what his attitude is. Even if he's pro-gay he could still be straight, but then you'd know you can probably trust him with knowing that you aren't.
I dont want to be that forward with it, he's quite shy and very withdrawn and I could 'scare' him, So I'm still stuck.
If you can't bring up the topic of gay people/rights in general, then I don't see how you'd ever have a more involved discussion about you guys. I doubt just mentioning that will scare him off, but he has a bad reaction then at least you can stop torturing yourself worrying whether something will happen. And if it goes well then you've made a big step forward.
I just don't want to scare him away, especially if he's not in a position to identify his sexuality whatever it is, coming straight out with talks like that could make him get defensive and I could miss out on a chance. I'm more secure with myself but if someone was to ask me right out i'd probably act out as a defense mechanism, I will try though, but I was hoping for some other way, Grrr wish this was easy.
If you can find a daily newspaper that's got gay marriage etc. stories in it, talk to him about the day's news, then introduce the gay topic. This is innocuous enough if you don't go overboard - oooh, gay marriage, what do you think, are you pro or con? - just try and get into a conversation, and he gets worked up about it, you were just talking about the news, what's he worrying about? You might not find out if he's gay or not, but you can probably find out his feelings towards the LGBT community. And if he reacts badly, but in an unconvincing manner (way to over the top, hesitant etc.) he may be deep in the closet, or supportive of gay rights, but living in a homophobic environment. Just my penny's worth.
I haven't seen him too talk to him and every weekend feels like ages, I just wanna start talking to him again, would it be creepy or stupid to add him on Facebook (No mutual friends)? This sucks so bad, *sigh*
This is how I feel about it: it's not creepy if you don't act creepy. Be cool about it. If you two know each other, facebook friends is not a big deal. Still, don't read into that too much if he does add you. I think people have echoed some good advice here so I won't repeat what's already been said on everything else. Best of luck to you!
You are getting lots of good advice. Mine would be to back up a step and try to figure out where he is coming from. If you are confused then maybe he is just as confused.
Ahhhhh I'm getting more and more confused but thank you everyone, I'm taking this advice but I havent seen him since the day I posted this to try anything im getting so frustrated lol :bang: I wish I could just call him now but I dont have his number.
