I told my mum i was gay yesterday.. I told her literally everything in the letter. Including how i was considering suicide two years ago.. She said she was fine with the gay part but she was upset about the suicide bit and feels like an awful parent.. Now i feel ashamed that i told her and i actually feel worse than when i was in the closet
Well I suppose in this case these feelings are only natural, I mean I felt the same as your Mum when I learned one of my friends had been self-harming. I felt awful because I could of been there for them, but I didn't know about it so I couldn't help. Your Mum probably is just thinking of how she would deal with it if you had. But remember that you got through it and your alive and well, and at least now your Mum knows about it if it comes up again. Remember your Mum loves you so the thought of losing you is unfathomable to her. But please just talk to her next time something like that goes through your head. I think it;s a good thing at you told her, now you don't have to be alone. (sorry if I'm repeating the same points over and over again #^^#)
Sounds like wonderful outcome? Why would you feel ashamed? She's ok with the gay part--and of course she'd be upset about thinking you'd gone through that and she didn't know and couldn't be supportive? Or do you mean, upset like, angry?
Was your Mum one of the reason you didn't commit suicide? If so tell her. Parents will always have that "I should have known" feeling when something isn't right with their children. The fact is you decided to stay in this world and that should tell you and her that she is going something right.
Don't feel ashamed that you told her! What good would it have done to keep that a secret? I think he response was reasonable as a parent, and it shows she loves you. I hope you start to feel better about having came out.
