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My best friend who has been soooo supportive

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by ScaredAndScarre, Dec 11, 2013.

  1. ScaredAndScarre

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    ...is moving away tomorrow for another state. If you've seen my other posts, you know that I have fallen head over heels with him, and that the impending departure is going to hit me hard.


    Well, it's here. Tomorrow is my last day with him until graduation in May, and then only God knows when I will see him face to face again. I could use some kind words. He could use some kind words.

    I'm afraid I will start drinking again without him....

    Thanks everybody.
     
  2. happiness

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    Hello!!! I just joined this website and saw your post. I haven't had the chance to read your previous posts but this is what I am thinking...

    Maybe you should tell him how you feel! I know it sounds super difficult and challenging, 'What if he doesn't like you anymore or thinks of you differently?' Overcoming this fear is what helped me come out to super close friends and family in the first place. In addition, I was able to overcome my fear of rejection by asking someone I found attractive to go on a date for the first time about a month ago. He said 'No' and I am still alive!

    I am not sure if your friend is heterosexual or you know the sexuality of your friend, but you may be surprised and discover he has feelings for you. Or you may learn he can appreciate you as a friend and keep things like this. If he is a true friend he will be friends with you unconditionally.

    If he takes it badly then maybe that is just the cosmos saying he isn't the 'friend' you thought he was and you expected something else.

    In any case, not saying anything will mean your feelings (outside of here) will still be internalized and cause more suffering and anxiety. Just breathe. Relax. Be courageous and know that no matter what happens you will be okay!!!!!!

    Just remember: In any situation you can accept, leave or change. Doing all three won't bring you happiness. Something useful to think about in this situation, too. You can tell him or not tell him. But it is important to be decisive and accept your decision. In this situation, I would go for it and see what happens! xx
     
  3. bingostring

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    Yes, I'm with "happiness" on this

    Keep in touch - special friends are special and distance can be conquered even if its Skype, email etc
     
  4. ScaredAndScarre

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    I'm an alcoholic. And I went to a bar with him and our other friends. BIG MISTAKE. I was miserable sitting at the bar while they were having a good ole time, drinking the night away. I sat there, my head on my hand watching the news on the television.

    I wanted to get out of there. I pretended I was on the phone, and went outside to finish the fake phone call. When I got outside, I put the phone in my pocket, and walked the mile back to my apartment in the 20˚ weather.

    "I'll take a glass of your finest top shelf ice water."

    By the way, my friend is straight through and through, and has absolutely none of those kinds of feelings for me. He's said that several times. I've accepted that.
     
    #4 ScaredAndScarre, Dec 11, 2013
    Last edited: Dec 11, 2013
  5. Heun

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    I'm sorry to hear that you're having a hard time with this. I won't pretend to understand your exact situation, but just a couple of weeks ago I had a similar situation with a great friend, although him and I had actually started messing around a week prior, which turned out to be a bit of a curse in disguise because we're now forced apart by our work and it has been rough; no doubt about it.

    Best advice I can give is to try to keep yourself busy with things and don't be afraid to maintain contact if that's a possibility or an option. Although it probably won't be the relationship you most want, it might help to stay good friends.
     
  6. ScaredAndScarre

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  7. ScaredAndScarre

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    Well folks, my heart is broken. He's gone.