is it bad?

is it bad if youre dating someone and they break up with you that you instantly cut them out of your life delete phone numbers, delete off social media e.t.c because you were hurt?
havent spoken to her since at all since i got my stuff back from her.

idk if its something i need to change about myself. like ive too and fro-ed back and forth with 2 girls playing with my emotions twice in my life and this time i just deleted everything to do with her even though we werent together long. im trying to learn from my mistakes which means me just not having any contact with my ex now till forever... but i cant tell if its a bad/immature thing to do? :s

 

People handle break ups differently. Its not like you're stealing their stuff or setting their car on fire. If its really that painful you should feel free to cut off all contact with them, but if they're a cool person you might want to hang out with in the future, you may not want to burn all the bridges. So, I wouldn't say its too immature, but you may not want to cut people out of your life forever.

 

I did the same exact thing after my ex girlfriend broke up with me. I felt like we were never really trying to be friends in the beginning, so why try to remain friends afterwards.

It was a mutual break up, but I took the first step in changing my relationship status on Facebook and I stopped following her on IG. And honestly, it was a very liberating feeling. I do not care what she's been up to, so to answer your question, you're not acting immature. You have to do what you need to do in order to move on.

 

I don't think the fact of cutting her off of your life when you break up is bad or immature, as when hurt, we wanna protect ourselves from more pain, that includes getting the source of the pain away, like if you burn yourself on the oven, you won't keep your hand on there!

But, as the others say, if you did share a connection with that partner, you might want, later on, once you both are healed, to communicate with that person and recreate a link, but more as a friendship. If you did no share a deep connection or never really became or felt "friends" then you should not communicate. It is not an obligatory thing of course, but even if you guys don't hang out together, just to be "okay" and not hold a grudge would be better for both of you.

 

I found the best route is not deleting the individual, but (where possible) blocking them from showing up in chat or timelines. That way they have no idea, it's easily reversed if wanted, and it won't ellicit emotions if you see their stuff coming up on your page. The latter is particularly good if you know they're likely to move on or replace you quickly and you don't want to see the statuses/images. It eases the burn without any negative consequences really. So they're there, but not in your face.

Deleting them isn't bad though if you feel the need. I just think the middle ground is "easier" just in case.

 

Tycho, I didn't think about that, I have to agree, it's a good "in between"

 

thanks people
tycho, yeah im 99% sure she will replace me quickly if she hasnt already. i dont want to know though so thats why i just deleted her instantly instead of hiding her updates as i would be tempted to 'check' :\