1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Long distance relationship

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Emilia, Dec 17, 2013.

  1. Emilia

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2013
    Messages:
    17
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Venezuela
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Hi. I used to have an account here on EC, but I deleted it because I was scared my family would find out (we share this computer).
    The thing is, I have a girlfriend, but she lives in a city that is like 10 hours away from mine. We met on the internet and fell in love, so we've been a couple for almost 10 months.
    She has visited me and I introduced her to my family as a friend, even though they probably now we're a couple. I've never talked about it at home, but it's kind of obvious. Also, I already came out to my mom and she took it pretty well.
    Having a long distance relationship is harder than I thought, and we're getting a lot of problems because we don't see each other very often. We love being together, but I don't know if we can handle this for another year or so. My girlfriend told me very seriously that she wants to move to my city. She says she can work and rent an apartment, and we could see each other everyday and eventually move on together. I'm 19 and she's 21, and we're both studying in college, so I told her we had to wait until we finish our careers. She says she doesn't want to wait, and I don't want to wait either, but I don't want her to abandon everything because of me. She says she understands and she's going to try to handle with this until we graduate, but we're suffering so much that I don't know if I'm making the best decision.

    Do you think I should accept her idea? Should she move on here?
    I just want your opinions, thank you for reading. (*hug*)
     
  2. i would concentrate on your college. will she move to your city having not finished her course? if so that sounds like a silly rushed idea, relationships can come and go but she will have to start her course all over again if she moves half way through e.t.c. i wouldnt advise it. finish both your courses then think about that is my advise.

    if next term she can somehow transfer to your city then that would be a better option, but again she would have to be able to support herself in a city she doesnt know very well (im assuming). what would happen if you both broke up? she would have to move back to her city and then start her course all over again.

    maybe thats why im single haha but i would concentrate on your career first. if she loves you/you both love each other then you should support each other in finishing both your courses im sure if you both do that things will work out better in the long run you can both have better jobs e.t.c and a better place to live rather than maybe working 9-5 in a grocery store becuase one of you didnt finish your course. there isnt anything wrong with working where i just said but if she is already halfway through studying for a better 'career' then why quit now?

    seeing each other every day if she does move will cause a lot of problems youll probably argue more becuase youll be in each other space 24/7. whatever you decide i would think a lot on it. it is a big move and a big decision.
     
  3. Emilia

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2013
    Messages:
    17
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Venezuela
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I know it's a big decision and thank you for your advice. I hadn't had the time for reading it and I'm still struggling with this problem, but what you said kind of put my feet on the ground. Thank you, you really helped me. (And sorry for my English, I'm still learning the language) :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  4. Kgirl

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2013
    Messages:
    266
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I know how you feel - my gf and I live on separate continents! But we have to make do seeing each other whenever possible. It is actually a good test of the relationship to see if it's worth the struggle. Good luck and I agree don't rush into anything, especially as you're both so young. :slight_smile: