How do you do this in the South?

I am smack dab in the middle of the bible belt. Through my late teens and 20's I lived as my true self in some places. My family is made up of fundamental christians. How dare I ruin the family and go to hell for my impure desires, according to them. Now I am in my second marriage to a man because I am a chicken, I guess. Better to bury myself than break my 93 year old Granny's heart, according to my Dad. Now I am 35 and have the three kids I always wanted, I am June Cleaver of the household, I have no real friends other than my husband. My art and writings are angry. I seclude myself and can barely breathe.

:dry: I am so much more than this.