So, I've never been in a meaningful relationship (other than with girls, more to hide myself), and so I'm trying to put myself out there using a variety of online methods (apps and such). The only problem is, I always feel so awkward (and kind of dirty with certain apps) using these methods. Most of the guys I come across are only interested in getting in my pants and I'm not really all about the whole hooking up and one night stand mentality. There's a gay group on my campus at school, but it's super cliquey. Otherwise, the options for meeting other gay guys in person are slim-to-none unless I head into Philadelphia (kind of hard to justify traveling an hour each way just to meet people). It would seem that this leaves me with very few methods other than the aforementioned apps on my phone to meet people. But I still feel so awkward not communicating to someone in person. I guess what I'm looking for is two-fold How to best overcome my awkwardness in these online situations and (I guess) how to put myself out there better. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
I was in a similar situation a few years ago. I didn't own a smart phone for apps, didn't like going out (still don't), and had the same experience with my school's gay group. But I had to meet people somehow, so I tried the craigslist m4m section. Not sure how active craigslist is in your area, but if it is, here's my case for giving it a shot: You can post one post, as short/long as you want, and lots of people will see it. This is as opposed to a gay dating app where you have very limited space to express yourself and can only talk to so many people at a time. You can take things slower this way and avoid awkward conversational pauses that might arise in a chat-based app. If you get a thoughtful response from someone, *then* you can give them your number or screen name and chat faster, since by then you'd have already broken the ice. It's a somewhat slower method, but much easier if you are insecure about making awkward conversation. That's how it was for me, and I met someone that I've been with for the last 3.5 years in a very close relationship. You just have to keep putting yourself out there and eventually someone interesting/worthwhile/whatever will take notice of you!
