Hello EC, To quickly bring you up to speed on my situation, my best friend, a female, a couple of months ago told me she had feelings for me, despite knowing I'm gay, and to make a long story short, I thought I'd give her a chance, and we dated for about three months. I soon felt that maybe I could be bisexual for her, but that feeling faded after about 2 months and at that point I started planning how and when I'd end it. Well, I did it last night, and she was devastated, and I'm in pain too because I'd never had to hurt someone I care about SO much... As a kid, she spent a lot of time being neglected abandoned looked down upon and bullied and just made to think that no one could ever love her. I was the first person that she had ever believed loved her, and when I broke up with her, it was just a powerful blow. We are STILL going to remain close friends and be in eachotherrs lives, but she's convinced that there will never be anyone out there better than me, but I think that's a big part of the moving on process, right? Finding someone else? I just need comfort? Has anyone else ever been with someone they thought would last forever but it ended?
I think most of us have been there at one point or another. And, of course, gay guys are often the perfect boyfriends for girls because they tend to be more thoughtful/gentle and in touch with their feelings than straight men are, which is why so many girls fall for gay guys. So hopefully in time she'll accept and appreciate that she has an amazing friend, and that she'll also find a wonderful husband who can love her the way she deserves. My guess is that she's just mourning the loss and will get over it.
I think that there are a lot of us who have been there at some point in our lives. I'm sorry that this happened, and I can only imagine how hard that is. Honestly, I believe that She fell for you because you have faced your feelings and come out, and she believed that you would be more in sync with your feelings and act with your feelings instead of your mind. I certainly believe that this is a temporary thing and that she will get over the loss of a relationship and come to realize that she is going back to a healthy friendship. Good luck.
Hm, I think you two are right... She came over today because we had plans to hang out anyways, and I thought it was just gonna be 5 hours of us crying and me apologizing til im blue in the face. But, we just sat and talked for about 30 minutes, she cried a little and I just hugged her. She said she knew it would happen one day but just wasn't prepared for it... I promised her that we'd still be friends and all, and she's still apart of our family and I still want her to move in with us (long story, she has some mom troubles). But after that, we watched some movies, we laughed, we talked, we joked, and it just felt normal... like everything might be alright... I know she may cry again, I know we'll be sad... I dunno, but I think she'll be okay, I sure hope so.
