Finally asked him out...now it's winter break...and he's depressed

In the last thread I posted, I talked about my first gay crush, and at that point, we were no more than friends.

Just before the end of the semester, I finally asked him out, and he said yes! Unfortunately, the timing was awful since it's winter break now, and we live so far away from each other. It's been about three weeks since I've seen him, and school doesn't start for a couple weeks still.

All break he has been on my mind. I just want to be able to see him and talk to him. I think he likes me, but I don't know yet, especially since we haven't even begun dating. I try not to over text him (once or twice a week). I don't want to seem desperate, but I also really miss him. I've though about trying to Skype with him, but I'm worried we're not at that point in our relationship yet. Again, I don't want to seem desperate or clingy.

On top of not being able to see each other, he told me in a text not too long ago that he has been battling depression. I just want to give him a hug and be there for him, but I can't and it's eating me up. Our text conversations tend to be really short (3-4 texts). He never was a big texter in the first place. Still, I'm worried about bothering him by texting him, even only a couple times a week.

I don't think I've ever been truly depressed, so it's hard to understand what he's going through and what I can do to help (if anything). Advice?

 

Thanks Aquaman. I did message him on Facebook and said to call me if he ever wanted to talk. I understand that I might not necessarily be the person he'd want to talk to about anything overly personal since it's early in our relationship, but I just wish there was something I could do. It sucks being so far away!

 

Perhaps it's a generational thing, but the reason I sent him a personal message on Facebook was because he'd been posting some things that were a little disconcerting. This was before he told me he was depressed.

Honestly, I agree. I'd love to write him a letter. I love receiving snail mail, and I think it would mean more to him than a text every couple days. Unfortunately, I don't know his home address. Maybe I'll try to find it using yellow pages or something.

@ resu: I believe he has been seeing a doctor. It seems like he has been trying to boost his self-confidence and self-worth. Still, it is depression, and as your comics pointed out, it's not necessarily something you can fight with just hope and positive thoughts. It probably requires more than that.

One thing that always seemed to put him at ease was my piano playing. Maybe I'll record some videos and send them to him. I think he'd like that.

 

Haha thanks, guys. I'll definitely have to do that then.

Also, I did find his address, and I've written a letter to him about what a great time I've had with him this past semester and how I look forward to spending time with him next semester. I just want him to know I think he really is amazing. At the same time, I tried not to pour everything out since, as I've said, we've not even "officially" had a first date.

 

Alright, I've written him a letter, and today, I recorded my piano arrangement of Lorde's song "Royals" (which is pretty sweet if I do say so myself) since we both really like that song. I'm still not entirely sure how I should put up the video for him to watch.

I could either send it directly to him (electronically) or I could post it to Facebook knowing that he'd see it (since I've posted videos of this nature before and he's mentioned them). Obviously, the first option is much more personal, but would it be too much? Maybe I'm overthinking it. I'm open to suggestions.

 

That was kind of what I was thinking of doing. Earlier in the year before I asked him out, I had recorded a few videos (that just happened to be of songs by artists he said he liked) and posted them on YouTube. Then, I shared them on my Facebook timeline, and that's how he came to know I was a good pianist. A number of wonderful evenings playing piano for him throughout the semester followed the posting of the videos.