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I am in love with my future mother-in-law. I need to stop, but I can't help it!

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by iwanthumphrey, Jan 9, 2014.

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  1. iwanthumphrey

    iwanthumphrey
    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Greater New York City Area
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight but curious
    I am not sure what my sexual orientation is. I have never thought of being with girls until my best friend and I (in high school) started developing feelings for each other (at the time I had no sexual feelings for her, just attraction and romantic feelings). Since then, I have pondered the possibility of being with another woman. Despite this, I have only still been with men.

    I met my fiance while in college. I love my fiance and have no intention of leaving him or hurting him. I started developing feelings for his mom when I job shadowed her (I needed some experience and her job is related to the field I was interested in). She is a petite woman that dresses more towards the butch-side, but also loves girly activities like painting her nails, beading, attending book clubs. I have always found mature women with a sense of moxy-ness to be very attractive, and she fits that profile. I also love the way she always takes off her glasses and puts it on her head. She seems to be an open-minded person: one of her son is gay, and she herself has once told my fiance that she has come to learn how to appreciate women's beauty. Furthermore, my fiance has told her about my fling with my best friend in high school, and she said that she understands that feeling of attraction without sexual desires.

    It has been 2 years since I have had feelings for his mom. I live across the country from her, and when I am in my own city, I think of her regularly. When I do see her, I just can't get enough of her. I know this is inappropriate as I am about to be her daughter-in-law, but I just can't seem to stop it. Please, I need advice!
     
    #1 iwanthumphrey, Jan 9, 2014
  2. iwanthumphrey

    iwanthumphrey
    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Greater New York City Area
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight but curious
    Is this such a taboo question that no one has any suggestions? I really need some advice!
     
    #2 iwanthumphrey, Jan 10, 2014
  3. TB8

    TB8
    Regular Member

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    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    this might not be helpful but :rolle: i would say well of coarse but you have to not like her no more:icon_redf i know how tough it is to like someone your not suppose to i have a crush on a straight girl who has a BOYFRIEND:cry: I been crushing on her for 3 years! :eek: and i been trying to get over her i think about her and when im around her :love: it just comes to do this question like her and watch my heart break in pieces:icon_sad: or leave her alone with her boyfriend and move on?(*hug*) :dry: same with you
    your fiance?:kiss: or his mom?(!) now im getting over my crush by little and little :smilewave what i do is think about negative things she done,remember hes your fiance MOM i know its tough but it goes all down to who do you love? him or her? :eusa_naug just think about it who propose to you:kiss:? who ask you to marry him(*hug*)? it was your fiance right? not his mom correct? think about the person you love and who you said "yes!" to:smilewave let time past by once you know it your over his mom and you can make a great laugh to it:roflmao: it just takes time to get over someone just dont go around telling people!
    :starwars: BYE! :icon_wink
     
    #3 TB8, Jan 10, 2014
  4. itsonlyrelative

    itsonlyrelative
    Full Member

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    Location:
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    You didn't seem like you had any intention of ever acting on this attraction on your furture mother-in-law because you said:
    and if you did act about your attraction for her, you would obviously hurt your fiance deeply. You would also ruin the relationship that he has with his mother. You didn't discuss whether he had a particularly strong relationship with her, but it must be fairly decent if you are seeing her this much. Honestly I would try your hardest to get her off your mind because that is probably your best option. There doesn't seem like there is much else you could do.
     
    #4 itsonlyrelative, Jan 10, 2014
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