I got home from a Scouts meeting today and my parents were sitting in the TV room talking quietly with the TV muted. They were responding awkwardly and the only things they said with much energy was "don't use your phone or computer for the rest of the night". My mom also had this weird look on her face which she has when she's mad at me or lying to me. I'm so scared I feel like I did something wrong but I can't think of anything they could get real mad at other than maybe seeing a few people who've added me on accident on skype that I talk to occasionally. Nothing really bad...they said they weren't mad and were just tired but I don't buy it. What do I do last time they were like this is the time they accused me of being gay. I feel so nervous now I can't sleep and I have a test tommorow.
By best advice, considering you have a test tomorrow, is to try and relax and not worry about it so much for the time being. It's easy when you're closeted to be scared and a but paranoid, I know I've been there. Even if there is something wrong, which is less likely if you truly think you've done nothing wrong, there's no use worrying about it now anyways. And besides, I'm sure everything is fine. Sorry that I don't have any better advice, I'm still just starting my coming out process so I'm no expert, but I hope I can help. PS When I feel anxious about something listening to calm music that I like always helps. Hope you feel better soon! (*hug*)
Hi, It sounds like they're concerned, but it doesn't sound like they're mad. If I were to guess.. I'd guess they found something on your phone or computer or something to suspect you're gay (or otherwise not straight) and that's why they've told you not to use the computer or phone. So, as hard as it is, I'd say do your best to calm down. If in fact they've found something, I'd say you might seriously think about just owning it (and where you are with your sexual orientation) to them, without pulling punches. That may sound scary as shit, but it's kind of like ripping off the band aid as another poster alluded to recently... it hurts, and is scary momentarily, but then it's done, and all the sudden you don't have all this energy you're putting into pretending to be someone you're not, and keeping up this facade. Remember that the EC community is here to talk to, and if you need it, our advisor team is also here to help one-on-one. Please keep us up to date on what's going on.
:/ It could just be nothing. Just distract yourself with music until they bring it up again. I don't think they have any reason to be mad. I hope you're ok (*hug*)
Thanks guys I'm a lot better now that they're acting normally again. Probably was my insomnia making me paranoid I can't sleep well....
Yeah i remember hiding everything from my parents concerning my sexuality and them being so suspicious of what I was doing. I hid my internet history and my phone texts from them and they did suspect some things. I would get so nervous when they looked at my computer when I was on it and when they questioned me about anything I was doing on there I was beyond paranoid. So even though I am not in your exact situation I know how you feel. My parents accepted my sexuality but the whole there are no secrets in this family rule was really hard on me when I was secretly exploring my sexuality and talking to other lgbt people online.
