I have really liked this guy for nearly a year now. He knows I like him, but to put it bluntly, he is a dick. We did some things with each other, then he would ignore me for a couple of days, speak to me again like nothing happened, then ignore me again. This went on for a good few months. It seems that he was leading me on and that I was his thing to talk when he was bored. All my friends agree say that he is a dick and people I don’t know that well have been telling me that he is bad news. It is his 21st birthday next month and he is going to a gay club in a city which is 45mins away from where we live. I have wanted to go there for a while and I have a chance to next weekend, but that is the same weekend he is going. There is no bad blood between us, but I think he wouldn't be happy if I was there. I also don’t want him to think that I am following him. We see each other every couple of months, and that’s only by chance. I only see him if we are in the same club. He will seem happy to see me, but that is probably because he is drunk. For me, it would feel like I am following him. I really want to go, but I don’t want to ruin his night out. I think he talks about me behind my back as well and I don’t want to tell people think that I am a stalker Part of me is saying stop being people pleaser. He doesn't care about you, so why should I care about him? But the other part is saying don’t go because you will ruin his night and he will hate you. What should I do?
You should not care about ruining his night if he has already been a jerk to you. You don't even have to talk to him at the club. That said, it seems obvious that if you didn't want to see this guy, you could just go to that specific club another time. So, perhaps you made this thread because in the back of your mind, you really do want to see him again. More broadly, why do you like this guy if your friends and other people have said he's so bad? Is it just physical attraction?
