Ok.. my mother is.. idk... for some reason she isn't or unable to grasp my situation... When I came out to her (first btw) she was very supportive.. it's only been a couple of days.. but now she can't seem to grasp what it is I am going through, and why.. she stated she did research into "Gender Dysphoria" but keeps asking me about it.. and it's getting me depressed that the one person I thought I could count on for support isn't there... She has issues wrapping her head around the fact that I want to be a female.. and still date females... and questions how'd we even be together & copulate... growing up shes always seemed to accept gay men.. but is this some double standard thing I'm not catching? like how some straight men have issues understanding gay men? should I just give her some time to process all this? my roommates (3 women, 2 men) one of which is my brother, one is his wife have all accepted me...the night I came out.. They had suspicions.. anyways I expect people to take it differently... but not from my Mother... who said she just wants me happy the night I came out to her Any advice would be loved! if you can make sense out of my worrying rambles
Hi Don't worry. I honestly think that you need to give your mother some time to deal with the whole thing. You wrote that your mother was very supportive at first, which is very good. It seems to me that she is just trying to understand you. You are her child and you have to remember that it is hard for her either. She just wants to make sure if you are fine and get to know more about what you are going through. That would explain resarching "Gender Dysphoria" Don't avoid speaking about your gender identity and sexual orientation as it seems that your mother is constantly trying to bring that topic up. Speaking with her about that may have a good impact on your relation. You shouldn't get too upset. I think that your mother accepted who you are
It really does sound like your mom is just confused and wanting to understand. I came to EC originally because I was panicking over my daughter being bi and not wanting to say or do anything that would make her feel like I was unsupportive while still worrying over her safety in our conservative community and her happiness considering we have extremely conservative anti-lgbt family members. Since I have been here I have learned so much about so many different gender/orientations that I had no clue even existed. Most of us outside of the LGBT community have only a basic grasp on gender and orientation issues. I mean it is pretty easy to grasp that a gay man is a man who likes other men and a lesbian is a woman who likes other women. Taking the next step to bisexual is really not that difficult of a jump either. When it gets beyond that it takes more thought and time to digest and understand. Give your mom some time and be glad that she is trying. When she asks you questions, answer them. Help her to understand what your identity means, not just to the LGBT community in general, but to you personally. Be patient with her as it really does sound like she is just lost in a world that she has never really given much thought to. Good luck to you.
Thank you both so much... she finally has seemed to come to understand... She wanted to tell her sisters about me... but I asked her if she was ready for that... she said "almost" and went on to talk about how shes beating herself up over how she "missed" this when I was growing up (I was in and out of therapy treatments growing up for anxiety, depression, etc etc) so they slapped me with ritalin and called me cured... she explained that was the real reason why she was hving issues accepting me
