I can't take it sometimes, it feels like they're just breathing down my neck sometimes and I want to snap. It's not even big things, it's all the little things that just build up and up. For instance today, wake up, take a shower and I have my clothes laid out all nicely for me. I'm 17 years old, I can pick out my own clothes to wear, I do every other day of the week. If I had asked my mom to, it wouldn't be a big deal, but I never do. I just want to wear what I want to wear. She later then insisted I got my hair cut. I like my long hair, a lot better than my short hair, I think I look more attractive that way, especially with a little stubble or facial hair. Because my mom doesn't like it, I now have short hair, I get no say. Both my parents bug me about shaving constantly as well, which is fine if it wasn't consistent nagging. They know I will eventually, I just don't want to (and because I wake up at 6 most days and have to leave the house by 7 and take long showers). Late my mom made digs about how I didn't wear the belt she laid out or tucked my shirt in because that 'looks nice.' Here I am 17 years old, and my mom is still trying to dictate how I dress and look. Now to last Saturday and a previous Friday at this same bowling alley. We were there for a match (Invitational last Saturday) and they sat at the table right next to where we were sitting. One of my teammates makes a joke, my mom laughs and says something at it. The Friday I go and my mom tries to give me this penny that she found because she's into the whole 'pennies from Heaven' thing. I don't. I didn't want the penny. She got all sad because I wouldn't take her penny. They're just too suffocating! I go bowl to have fun with my friends and they're just there breathing down my neck and I can't have fun then! My dad is convinced that he needs to teach me how to do like everything. Oh, it's snowing? Well time for you to learn how to use the snow blower. Now that you do, you have to come out and help me every time no matter what you're doing. Oh, I'm putting your snow tires on your car? Despite that you're working on stuff you have to take time out of your day and stand there watch me while I put the tires on and then I'll watch while you fail to do the jack under the car. His logic is that he's failed at teaching me how to do these things and that he dropped the ball on it. The thing he needs to realize is that I don't care and that I'm not him! But he doesn't and is convinced that I need to learn everything. Every day I get stuff like "Look at colleges yet?" "Oh, what are you hiding?" When my mom comes in and I turn the volume down or I close my laptop, "Are you sad?" since my mom now thinks I'm depressed all the time because she found a notebook I wrote in in 8th grade that said I was depressed...I'm in 11th. Stuff like that. All the time. Advice, please!
I know how frustrating that can be as my parents were like that for quite awhile. For the most part I think it's harmless though, particularly what your dad is doing. You'll learn some useful things from him and it's not unreasonable for him to want you to help out a little occasionally, as annoying or inconvenient as that may be sometimes. As for your mom, it's fine for her to have an opinion and to give you advice or suggestions, but she needs to understand that you're 17 and don't need to be micromanaged anymore. You should be able to wear what you like and keep your hair in whatever style you think suits you. Overall though, try not to be too upset. It's obvious they care a great deal about you and are just trying to stay part of your life. It could be a lot worse.
Sounds to me like you're a pretty lucky kid. I think your parents just care about you. I know it sucks now; but you'll miss it when you get older. Who knows, maybe someday you'll be doing doughnuts in a parking lot and rip the tire off a rim and you'll be thankful that your dad took the time to show you how to change a tire. . .
I get that my dad is trying to help, but like he'll be building something and he'll insist I stand there and watch so I can learn how to do it myself. I don't plan on building things. Hell, I want to be an English teacher, not a carpenter or something of the sort like the other guys on my dad's side. One time I had to stand outside and watch him 'properly' wash my car even though I had been inside doing homework. It's not even like I was washing my car. I'm fine with advice, but she needs to realize that I don't have to take it. Her answer to me today was 'Well you don't buy your clothes yet.' So what? I get that they care but I need my space. They'll barge in my room, I can't even lock my door (which those two combined are a detrimental pain to a teenage boy...hint hint). My Health/Driver's Ed teacher actually told our lass to do donuts in the snow the other day, but even if I did, do I remember? No, I don't.
First,I am gonna give you an advice about how to deal with overprotective mother. Based on personal experience. This solution might seem a little bit creul towards her, but is probably the best one. You need to set a border. Be firm. You have to tell your mom what bothers you and ask her to stop being overprotective. Tell about how it makes you feel uncomfortable and frustrated, but try to be as delicate as possible. She probably will start telling how it is important for her to take care of you and how you hurt her by telling her that. Unfortunetly, you have to be positive even if that hurts her. You will have to do that eventually, unless you want to live under her pressure your whole life. You are not a terrible person for doing that to your mother.It is, in a way, thing that has to be done, so don't feel bad about it. As for your father, I am not going to be so helpful. I think that you can talk to him about how the amount of work you have to do with him sometimes overhelms you and how you don't always have time to help him. But then again, your father has a point and some of the things he teaches you might be very useful. So try to get to compromise to him and ask him to have more free time, but don't try to convince him into stopping what he is doing completly. Good luck Btw. are you the only child? Because i would guess that you are
Heh, I remember what that was like. I ended up getting a giant U-shaped desk and had my computer facing the door so nobody could ever see my screen if they barged in.
Haha, I get it man. I really do. It's frustrating. You're at the point where you wanna figure shit out on your own; but everyone else has a faster or better way to do something. They insist you do it their way, and that's BS. My advice. Listen to what they say; but do things however you see best.
Sorry, Moogie, but I can't be like that. And no, I have an older sister but she's in college. @mbanema, but see, my desk faces the wall and the screen faces the door. Even when I have my laptop on my bed, you can tell I'm being fishy. @basic obviously you've never met my dad, he thinks his way is law. Everythng must be clean, no piles of stuff, no leaving stuff around, must clean cars the way HE wants. Trust me, I know how frustrating it is.
Hahaha.... I'm currently halfway across the planet and still my mum manages to patronise me... I guess you could try and tell them about how it annoys you... or maybe ask that they don´t come to your bowling meets... other than that just try and spend as much time out of the house as you can
