Wondering if anyone has any advice for a guy who's currently in a long distance relationship. My situation is, still living with my mother, who for the record, is either in the denial of me being gay, or thinks I'm straight after having gone back in the closet for her benefit. That's a little besides the point. While I'm living with her, I'm dating a guy who lives in Florida and still lives with his parents. He's still living with them because they support him financially while he's going through school. Again, a little besides the point. Let me get to it right now. We've been together for a year now, and so far, it's been great between us for our first year. We had Skyped, called, and texted as often as we can. Up until recently, I wasn't bothered much by the long distance factor. If anything, the long distance brings us closer together because we want to build a future together. We've already talked about getting an apartment together, although we still have some things to work out. Now lately, we haven't been spending so much time together. With him being in school, and me working, we don't get to see much of one another. I don't know if that might be the cause of the problem, although, it never caused us that much distress. I just hope that this isn't something that will put a wall between us and cause us to split. If anyone can offer me some advice on what I should do, I really appreciate it. :icon_sad:
I would try to connect with him even if it's just for a few minutes each day. If he's really busy try sending him a text that days something along the lines of I hope you're having a great day I miss you. Just getting a message that takes two seconds to send can mean a lot.
Hello thecasjerem, I think it is pretty cool that you are giving this LDR a chance, and have actually been successful at it for a year; I mean, if back in the 1800s people made it work by sending letters that took weeks and months to arrive, why wouldn't we be able to with all the conveniences modern technology offers? Not long ago, I found this pretty cool video of a couple who has tips for a successful LDR: Long Distance Relationships - YouTube Clearly, communication is the most important component of an arrangement like this. As busy as your lives may be, you have got to make the time to contact each other, not only to talk about the important things, but also to talk about the small, silly things (Im heading to the supermarket to buy milk, my hair sucks, I just saw someone who looks like carrot top, etc). You have to replace the lack of physical proximity with other things to make yourselves part of each other's everyday life. Don't let the "radio silence" go into a snowball effect. By the way, what are your ages? Any chance that you get to meet in person soon?
I'm 23 and he's 20. We've already met up. He came to visit me last year in July. We're currently planning on me visiting him this time sometime in June. Summer works best for him because he's not in school. As for the radio silence thing, there's only so much we can do. It's not to say that we don't text or talk to one another, because before, we communicated all the time. Now it's just that it seems like school and work are getting in the way more often than it use to. I want to say that me visiting him will help us, but I don't want it to get to the point that my visit will be less meaningful because of the problems we're having. I will take both of your advices and talk to him more and hopefully it'll help in the long run.
